


Heaven's So Far Away

by Teaspoone



Series: Heaven's So Far Away [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Guardian Angels, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Blood and Gore, Horror, M/M, Minor Character Death, Romance, a little kun too everyone needs a little kun, chenle/jisung might be added, i promise the main boys will be fine
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-05-06 00:00:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 26,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14629767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teaspoone/pseuds/Teaspoone
Summary: Yuta's Angel was sent to him after Yuta's best friend was killed. Neither of them knew just how much Yuta was really going to need one.Or! A zombie apocalypse/guardian angels au that literally no one asked for.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> BTW, I originally was gonna write this as an EXO Chanbaek fic but I saw the severe lack of Yuwin fics and that needed immediate fixing. So, sorry if I mess up a name somewhere. Let me know if anyone sees one <3

**_Chapter One_ **

_ The Angels of the Tree _

 

All Angels are creatures born of light; purity and love. They come from the millions of leaves that fall from the Tree of Life and land among the roots at the bottom of the giant being. The Tree only allows a few thousands of the leaves that fall to become Angels, you see, so it is a great honor to be chosen for this role. They are given their lives by the roots of the Tree if they are so lucky to land upon one. After they dissolve into the roots of the Tree, their Angel forms are then given the gift of life.

When an Angel is _Born_ , they have no physical form. They are given only the gift of sight and a sense of their purpose; their _Charge_. All Angels are given a Charge to seek out. A _Link_ \- a string that ties them to that person for all of their life- appears when their Charge is in great need. 

Most Angels choose to stay beside the Tree for some time after their birth. The Tree does not make them leave. When they hear the call of their Charge, they will leave the Tree instantly. If, in the rare case that the Angel cannot find its way to its Charge, they will then be returned to the Tree to die, so that a new Brother might be born in their image.

An Angel with no Charge has no life, no purpose. The Tree gives them the gift of life; it is their Charge who allows them to keep it.

If an Angel waits beside the Tree for so long that it meets a new Brother, they are unaware of them. Only Angels who have formed physical bodies can feel when a new Brother has been born. They are unable to see or sense a new presence before they have created their bodies, and so they have no mind to remember with before that time.

The Tree has continued to do this from the beginning of time. The last Angel it birthed was one known only as ‘Jungwoo’, though the Tree did not name him that.  The Tree never names its children. They choose their names when they find their Charge, after forming their bodies. Jungwoo’s birth was almost 15 years ago.

After him, the Tree had not birthed another. 

None, not even the oldest or wisest of Angels, knew why the Tree had not yet given them another Brother. They feared the worst- perhaps the Tree had depleted all of its mystical energy? Had it died? Been attacked by some unknown force? Or worse, what if it had simply abandoned them, its own children? 

In truth, the Tree had grown tired of seeing its children returning to him. In the beginning, Angels were hardly ever returned to him before their time, but lately, there had been an almost constant flow of Angels who had lost their human counterparts and so had drifted back to him to be dissolved, as the only way an Angel could be killed was to kill its Charge. The Tree had stopped birthing its children because it was trying to find a way to help them- to make them stronger in some way- so they wouldn’t be returned to him so quickly.

Finally, one day, the Angels felt a tug in their souls. A new Brother had joined them, at last. 

On this same day, the Angel, Jungwoo, who had been birthed before him, finally felt the call of his Charge, right before his new Brother’s birth, and left the Tree’s side to find him. He had been waiting for the call of his Charge all that time.

Jungwoo’s next eldest Brother, Ten, left with him. The two felt their Charges at the same time, an extremely rare occurrence, though they knew nothing of it at the time.

When the newest Angel was born, he was given a special gift by the Tree. The Angel was unaware of this gift; the Tree did not tell him of his power. It would not do so. The Tree was going to test this Angel, to see if his gift would better protect him or not.

When the newest Angel was birthed, he had an instant connection to his Charge. The Angel did not wait one moment before seeking out the one he was to protect; literally his entire reason for living. The Tree was surprised to see its child so ready to leave him, and was a bit saddened at seeing such a special Angel go. But with the knowledge that his child was so strong that it was able to leave him so quickly, the Tree had hope that the new wave of Angels he would birth with this gift would be better able to protect their Charges.

The Tree had succeeded. This new Angel was, indeed, more able to protect those around him than any Angel before.

And when this Angel found his Charge, a boy named ‘Nakamoto Yuta’, he knew what he would be called even before he had formed his body.

He would name himself…  _ Sicheng. _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Figured id post this now so its not so boring. Now you get to see a little bit of what the Angels can do :) hope you enjoy~

**_Chapter Two_ **

 

_ The Birth of the Strongest Angel _

 

Sicheng’s body did not take as long as it would take other Angels to form. His body was created in an alleyway, crouched down low, behind a dumpster. His body was not the most impressive or intimidating form that he could have made; he had been put on a time constraint due to his Charge being in need. 

After his body was formed, Sicheng stared down at his naked self, turning his arms over to inspect them. His fingers were long, nails clipped short to his fingers. Toned arms, strong, rounded thighs, and his skin a light bronze color. His chest, though not too openly muscular, was flat and athletic- strong. He had narrow hips and shoulders, that he knew, but he could not change his body now that it had been formed once.

Sicheng turned around in his newly-shaped form. His legs were lithe and full of a grace that only Angels possessed. He jumped around smoothly, almost gliding on air between the two buildings. Momentarily forgetting his Charge’s need, he played around with his new body like a baby who had just discovered its own arms.

In the middle of jumping and climbing on things, Sicheng accidentally kicked a beer can with his foot. Shocked at the sudden loud, clanging noise, Sicheng froze. He slowly walked over to the discarded thing, and bent over it to inspect it.

Carefully, holding his breath, Sicheng reached his hand out and touched the smooth metal of the can, pulling his hand back at the cool surface.

Smiling wide, Sicheng bent over and picked the can up, rolling it around in his hands.

_ I can feel! _

Sicheng cocked his arm back and threw the can against a wall, where it flattened against the building with a loud cracking sound before falling to the ground below.

He beamed and let out a small laugh, then immediately covered his mouth, eyes wide and confused. Slowly, Sichenf dropped his arms and opened his mouth to hear the sound again, but the only thing he heard was his breath.

Brow furrowed in confusion, the newborn turned to the opening of the alley, where a beam of light sat high up in the sky. Reaching a hand up to block the sun, he stumbled out of the alley and into the street, terrifying a young woman with his nakedness.

The woman screeched loudly, covering her eyes for a brief moment before bringing her hands down and scowling at Sicheng. “Put some clothes on! What is wrong with you?”

But Sicheng only cocked his head at her, a bit like a puppy, unable to understand what she had said to him. The woman’s eyes softened at this, as Sicheng’s Angel was subconsciously soothing her temper.

“Ex...excuse me?” She questioned him hesitantly. “Are…. can you hear me?”

Sicheng just continued to stare at her with wide eyes, before he finally remembered his Charge. He suddenly jumped and looked around wildly to find the Link, unthinkingly, momentarily forgetting that he could only see his tether to his Charge in his Angel form. 

The woman gasped before him, but Sicheng payed her no mind as he closed his eyes tightly, calling on his Angel firm to find his Charge.  **(A/N: I can’t figure out how to fit this in, but when an Angel goes into Angel form, their body freezes and gets heavy as stone. When they get more experience, they learn to take make their body disappear.)**

His Angel form briefly registered that the woman before him had a yellow outline around her, like all living forms, before taking to the sky. He flew above his body and the woman who now had her hands on him, and looked around for the line that would lead him to his Charge. After searching frantically, he finally found the bright blue tether that all Angels knew was the Link. 

Still in his Angel form, he followed the Link down the road, and flew right into a large building with humans wearing white clothing and bright lights that blinding him slightly.

The Link lead him through a door into a tiny room, where his Charge was sitting beside a 

human male who was lying in a bed with rails on the side. The unknown male’s yellow outline was extremely weak and dull, but the Angel did not care for that as he saw his Charge for the first time.

Sicheng’s Charge was simply beautiful. He was a male, like himself, but the Angel did not care for such trivial things as gender. Sicheng’s Charge had short, black hair that looked so soft even his physical body twitched to touch it. From what Sicheng could see, his Charge was tall, only a few inches shorter than Sicheng, and the large muscles in his back and arms flexed with what Sicheng could see were sobs.

Hiss Charge, unlike other humans, had a bright blue halo around him that stood out in the colorless world that those in their Angel forms see. The Link pulsed along with his Charge’s heartbeat, and brought color to his Charge where Sicheng would normally see grey. As he got closer to his inhumanly handsome face, Sicheng’s heart fluttered in his chest.

He knew, from that first moment, that he would lay his very life down for his Charge.

Returning to his body, Sicheng’s physical form opened its eyes to the scared woman before him. The woman reached down and grabbed Sicheng’s hand in her shaking ones. “Are you okay? What happened to you? Can you hear me?!” She screamed loudly in his ear, voice full of immense concern for the Angel.

Sicheng quickly reached up to soothe the poor human, but when he touched her head a wave of energy hit him, filling his brain with knowledge of this world. The strange symbols on the signs around him became letters and words that he could understand. The words she was speaking, he could finally understand those as well. Every bit of knowledge that the woman possessed had been given to him, so he would not be lost in this strange place any longer.

Sicheng sucked in a deep, desperate breath, and fell against the woman heavily. He panted out, voice incredibly beautiful and deep even as he gasped for air, “Hos... hospital. Need hospital…”

The woman nodded quickly, then took off her jacket and wrapped it around the boy’s hips for modesty. “Okay, sweetie,” the woman said to him, going around him to put her hands on his back. “I’m going to take you there now, okay? Don’t worry, you’ll be just fine in a minute. Can you walk for me, please?”

Sicheng nodded stiffly, forcing his body to take a step, though he was exhausted. The woman lead him to her car slowly, then sat him in the passenger’s seat, buckling him tightly before setting off down the road.

Sicheng, energy completely drained at this point- he was a newborn, after all- was asleep before the woman had even put the car into gear.

 

…

 

When Sicheng next awoke, he was lying on a hospital bed. The woman who had brought him here was not in the room with him, but he was only worried about his Charge. He closed his eyes tightly and changed into his Angel form, and saw that the Link was very bright, meaning that his Charge was close. The Link went above him, through the ceiling, so he followed it until he found his Charge’s room.

Sighing in relief, Sicheng returned to his physical body and sat up in the bed, getting caught on a wire that was sticking from his arm. Frowning, he grabbed hold of the wire and ripped it out of him, ignoring the stinging pain as he rose from the bed. He looked at the digital clock on the wall and saw that it was almost 8:00 at night. 

Hurrying gracefully through the opened door, Sicheng ran to the end of the hall and took the elevator to the floor above, then all but sprinted to his Charge’s room.

_ Room 178 _

__ Sicheng sensed that his Charge was sleeping, which was all the better for him because he didn’t want to scare the boy. So Sicheng slowly pushed the door open, heart racing in anticipation at seeing his Charge in person for the first time, and walked inside the dimly lit room.

The human man who shared a room with his Charge was sleeping peacefully in the other bed. Each breath the unknown male took was weak and choked. Sicheng knew that the human did not have much time left in this world, but was uncaring as he gazed upon his Charge.

Graceful and silent, he made his way over to his Charge’s bed, sitting just on the edge of it. Raising one hand, he willed a little bit of light- no brighter than the dimmest phone screen- to illuminate his Charge’s handsome face.

His Charge wrinkled his nose, looking very child-like, then groaned something in his sleep. Sicheng smiled lovingly at the human, reaching up with his free hand to finally touch his Charge’s smooth skin.

The man was hot and sweating. Sicheng gently pushed his hair out of his face and let out soothing waves of calm to the boy, having noticed how fast the human’s heart was racing. It worked, as his Charge’s skin began to cool and his body finally started to relax.

The next time Sicheng bothered to look away from his beautiful Charge to check the clock, it read that it was almost 3:00 in the morning, and his physical form had grown quite tired. It would take some time for his body to catch up to his Angel strength and endurance levels; time that would be spent by his Charge’s side, protecting him. Sicheng didn’t think it was such a bad thing, being trapped by his body’s physical limitations, if it meant that he could be next to his Charge.

Sicheng yawned, surprising himself again at the new sound and sensation of being ‘sleepy’, and turned his head to the empty hospital bed on the other side of the room. His every instinct told him to stay with his Charge during the night, but he didn’t want to scare or confuse the human, so he returned to his own room.

After a few minutes of lying in his bed, he found that he couldn’t sleep. He was too busy thinking about his Charge. But he reminded himself that he had to sleep so he could meet his Charge formally in the morning, and with this knowledge, he closed his eyes and slept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When they're in their Angel forms, Angels only see in black and white. Living creatures have a white outline, dying creatures have a yellow one that fades to black as they get closer to death and their Charges have a bright blue one. Other Angels have bright purple outlines, and the Link between them and their Charge is also purple, so Angels can see anyone's Charge.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning:   
> Minor character death  
> Mentions of cancer

**_Chapter Three_ **

 

_ The Day of Grief - Yuta _

__

_ (Four days before Sicheng was Born) _

 

“Hey, Hansol!” I called cheerfully as I entered his hospital room, with my backpack still on my shoulders. I slung it in front of me and started to open it, looking for the laptop I kept in there.

Hansol smiled weakly at me and tried to pick his hand up to greet me, but grimaced painfully and let it fall back with a thud.

I noticed this, but Hansol didn’t like it when I made a big deal over his illness, so I didn’t comment or try to help him. Instead, I forced a cheerful smile on my face and pulled a chair from the desk in the corner up to the side of his bed and sat down, placing the laptop on the little tray to his right. Hansol didn’t notice me doing this, as he was focusing on my lips to read them.

“Look what I got, dude,” I grinned at him, pulling a movie from my bag and holding it up to him with a bright smile. “ _ Resident Evil _ ,” I told him with a smile, though he wasn't looking at me.

He looked at the movie for a second before he lifted his hand and signed,  _ The third one, again? We’ve already seen that, like, a hundred times. _

__ “I know!” I laughed and I swear I saw his smile grow a little bigger. “But it’s the best one to make fun of, and you know it. Now come on; up you go, big guy.” I reached over his skinny frame and grabbed the remote to his bed, pressing the button to raise him up so he could see the screen better.

He rolled his eyes at me with a smile as I put the movie into the DVD slot of the laptop and started the show, and reached over to pat my head to get my attention.

I looked at him, then down to his hands to see that he was signing again.  _ I don’t think you understand how much you’ve made me hate this movie, Yuta. _

__ “Yeah, you’re probably right,” I smiled cheerfully again, exiting out of the menu and finally starting the movie.

The opening played as usual, with Hansol occasionally mumbling complaints under his breath about how boring the movie was the  _ first time _ he’d seen it. More than once, he tried to grab one of the magazines from the table next to him, claiming that even reading “100 facts about the human digestive system” for the third time was more interesting.

When there was only about 20 minutes left, Hansol started moaning, low and scratchy. I jumped, turning to him to see a big wince on his face, eyes screwed shut, as he clutched the sheets beside him. “Hansol?” I questioned quietly, afraid he had fallen asleep and was having a bad dream. “You okay, hyung?”

His eyes opened and I saw him shake his head once before going back to writhing- or, slowly moving around on the bed as his bones creaked and groaned. He lifted one hand and messily signed,  _ Medicine… on table… _

__ I fumbled to grab the small bottle of  _ Fentanyl _ , knocking my laptop over and onto the ground in my hurry. Trembling, I quickly unscrewed the bottle and poured two little capsules into my hand, then cupped them over Hansol’s mouth and let them fall in. Then I grabbed the bottle of water and placed the straw to his lips so he could swallow them, heart racing all the time.

After I’d pulled back, I heard him swallow painfully. A few seconds later, he relaxed, coughing a bit more than he usually does after he comes back from an attack, but at least the look of absolute pain was gone from his face.

He winced a few more times, before turning his head up to look at me with tears in his eyes, and then looked over to where the laptop used to sit. Hansol sniffled and frowned, then lifted his hands again and signed,  _ Thank you. I’m really sorry about your laptop, dude. _

__ I shook my head quickly, fighting back the tears, and forced a happy smile on my face again. “No problem, hyung; it’s okay, really. Don’t worry about it. I can get another one.” I laughed, almost choking on the bubble in my throat. Clearing it and reaching a still-shaky hand to wipe the beginnings of tears from my eye, I let out a small laugh. “Besides, I was getting kind of sick of that movie.” My voice cracked at the end and Hansol must have seen the look on my face because he suddenly grabbed my arm as I went to turn away from him.

All he signed was,  _ I’m sorry, Yuta. I know it’s hard- _

__ Spinning around, I cut him off. “No! Hansol, don’t you dare apologize!” I was crying hard at this point, talking so fast I wasn’t sure that Hansol caught everything. At his look of shock, I took a second to make my voice quieter, though my breath was heavy with what I could tell was a panic attack coming on.

“It’s not your fault my computer broke. I knocked it over. Not you. Not- you- you didn’t do anything to it. I was just getting your med- your pills and it- it fell and-”

Hansol placed his hand over mine and pulled my fingers away from my mouth- I didnt even notice I’d been biting my nails.

I continued on, slightly soothed by his hand on mine. “You have too much to worry about without this too. I can get a new laptop, okay?” I paused and Hansol started lifting his hand again as if to sign to me but I cut him off by pulling it back into mine. “You- you just worry about getting better and coming home, Hansol! That’s your job! You get better, and I go get a new laptop so we can binge watch  _ Walking Dead  _ or some other show while we wait for you to get... for you to get….” I broke off and covered my mouth with one hand, smacking my fist down against Hansol’s tray with the other, ignoring the stinging pain.

“Yuta…” Hansol tried to whisper, but months of not using his voice for anything other than moaning and crying out left it scratchy and almost inaudible. He winced at the sound of his own voice, or maybe it actually hurt to speak, and closed his eyes tightly before opening them to stare up at me again.

“Shh, hyung,” I commanded him quietly, reaching up to carefully caress his bald head where his black hair used to be. “Don’t try to talk; you know what that doctor said.”

Hansol nodded tightly, then pulled my hand away from him, signing with the other.  _ Yuta… I wanted to tell you something… when you left yesterday, you left this here. _

__ He reached for something under the stack of magazines on the table and pulled out a crumpled sheet of paper with my name and the name of the hospital on it. I reached over and took it from him with a gasp. “No, Hansol! How did you- you weren’t supposed to look at that. This is my decision. You aren’t going to stop me from-”

Hansol slammed his hand over my mouth and glared at me while signing with one hand.  _ Shut. Up. And. Listen. To. Me. For once in your life, Nakamoto Yuta, listen! You are not going to drown yourself in debt to save me. There IS NO saving me, Yuta! I am dying! The doctor doesn’t even think I’ll make it through this month! _

__ I shook my head, tears that I had fought so hard to keep back now freely streaming down my face. “No! No, you’re not dying! Look at how much better you’ve gotten! You… your gaining weight, and… you’re not…”

Hansol shook his head at me again, a common occurrence between us these days.  _ I’m dying, Yuta. You have to accept that. I won’t let you ruin your life to save me, because there is nothing to save. Please, Yuta. You have to let me go. Go back to college; get an education, get back on the soccer team, I know it’s not too late- I’m sure they’ll give you your scholarship back if you explain what happened to them. Go have fun. You can’t spend every waking moment by my side anymore, Yuta. You need to live… _ Hansol leaned up and gave me a peck on my cheek.  _ For me, Yuta. Do it for me. _

__ After Hansol finally collapsed back into his bed with a weary groan, I turned my back to him and smothered my sobs into my hands as best as I could, realing with pent-up frustration; both at him, this whole situation, and myself. In all the chaos, I hadn’t even gotten the chance to tell him I’d used up the money from my scholarships to pay for his hospital bills.

Hansol gave me a few minutes to calm myself before he tapped me on the shoulder and I turned to face him again.  _ Yuta,  _ he signed again,  _ would you please go get my nurse? I think it’s time for another massage. _

__ Though tears still flooded from my eyes, I nodded my head and rose from the chair, shakily making my way across the room and to the door. I poked my head into the hallway and looked down to where I knew the nurse would be waiting behind the corner. “Miss-” My voice cracked. I swallowed and called again. “Miss Lynn Hansol’s asking for you.”

She appeared in front of me in seconds, smiling at me gently as she reached up to pull my head down to the crook of her neck and shoulder in a warm hug. We stood there for a minute or two- both knowing that Hansol hadn’t really needed her at that moment- while I calmed down. She finally released me and wiped the tears from my cheeks. “Yuta, I’d like to talk to you after I’m done in there, please. Don’t go too far.”

I nodded my head at her, heart clenching as she moved past me into the room where my dying best friend lay.

 

…

 

After about half an hour of waiting in the lounge, Miss Lynn finally came out of Hansol’s room. She looked around for me for a second before she finally spotted me and walked over. I put the magazine that I was reading down and stood to meet her. “You wanted to talk to me?” I asked, voice raw from crying.

She nodded, frowning sadly. “Yuta,” she started quietly, leaning up on her tiptoes to whisper into my ear. “I don’t know how to say this, but Hansol and I have been talking, and he thinks that… it would be best if you.. if we...” She trailed off uncertainty.

I spoke for her. “He wants me to pull the plug.”

She didn’t speak for a few seconds. “Yes,” she finally answered. I turned away from her and sat on the floor in front of the chair, head in my hands. “Oh, honey,” she tried to calm me by rubbing my back in circles. “I think you and I both know that he’s suffered long enough with this. His cancer, it… pancreatic cancer is one of the most painful types to treat, let alone to live with for as long as he has, sweetheart. I think, I think Hansol is finally ready to be done with it all.

“And he told me about your financial situation. For that reason alone, Yuta, you have to think about what putting him through this any longer will do to him- or to  _ you _ .” She stood up as her pager began to beep in her pocket. “I’m not asking you to make a decision now, honey, no. But I want you to think about it, okay, Yuta?” She patted my head a few times before turning her back on me and walking away.

I sat there, staring at the floor with my cried-out eyes for a long while before I stood back up and walked out of the hospital without saying goodbye to Hansol.

 

…

 

The next day, I walked in the hospital with a duffle bag in my arms, hair tousled and still in my pajamas. The woman at the front desk looked up at me with wide eyes for a moment before going back to whatever she had been doing.

Sleepily, I stumbled through the hallway and crashed against Hansol’s door, but didn’t enter his room. Someone let out a small gasp from behind me but I didn’t turn to see who it was - I knew it even as Miss Lynn clapped her small hand on my shoulder and spun me to face her.

“Honey,” she started with wide eyes, her Texan accent becoming more obvious in her distress. “Did something happen? You know visiting hours aren’t until 8:00… what brings you here so early?”

I kept my head down but answered her respectively. “I couldn’t pay the rent anymore. My landlord kicked me out.”

If she was surprised, she didn’t show it, but she frowned and shook her head at me sadly. “Honey,” she started. “I’m really sorry to hear that. I can’t imagine what it would be like to lose your home…” Her hand reached up and grabbed my shoulder, shaking me gently. Then she lowered her head and was quiet for a second. After a few beats of silence, she continued in a calm voice, she said, “I’m really not allowed to do this, now, Yuta… And I know you would never ask for this, but I think it would be okay if I let you stay in the hospital for a while-”

I looked up at her with tears in my eyes and she stopped talking. After a few seconds, she opened her arms to me and I hugged her tightly, leaning my head down on her shoulder. She reached up and patted my hair as she waited for me to get myself under control again.

“I…” I started, choked. I cleared my throat. “I thought about it. Uh… I think you… you can do it.” Unable to bring myself to say the words- we both knew what I was talking about- I took a deep, shuddering breath. “But… can I- can I stay with him when it happens?”

“Honey-”

I cut her off, squeezing her tighter. “Please, Ann. I’m all he has…”

After a few tense seconds of silence, Miss Lynn sighed and her shoulder slumped. “Okay, honey. I’ll let you be there with him, but if it gets to be too much, I want your word that you’ll leave. I don’t want you to have to see that.”

Without answering, I nodded my head against her shoulder and let my tears fall onto her uniform.

 

_ …. _

_ (Two days later) _

**_A/N:  This is the day after Sicheng was born. I get confused about this too, so I wanted to clarify. K we good. :)_ **

 

I didn’t leave Hansol’s side at all the day he was scheduled to die. He kept glaring at me and signing for me to get out, that he didn’t want me to see this. But I couldn’t stand the thought of leaving my only friend in his last hours to die alone.

When the doctors finally came into his room only a few hours after I had woken up, Hansol and I were playing with a deck of cards one of the other nurses had brought in a few days prior. I think we were both just trying not to think about it.

I had my back turned away from the door, but I could tell when the doctor came by Calvin’s face. I slowly turned towards the doctor and saw that he was standing in the doorway with a sad frown. Hansol lifted one hand and signed something to the older man.

The doctor, confused, looked to me. “I’m sorry, did you catch that, Yuta?”

I nodded and turned back to Hansol, looking down at my hand of cards. “He asked if we could finish our game first,” I answered. My voice, surprisingly, did not crack.

Apparently the doctor must have nodded to Hansol, as Hansol then played his next card on top of mine.

After only a minute or two of me purposely taking my time to place the cards- stalling- the game ended. Slowly, Hansol gathered the cards into a pile and placed them on the table beside him, then looked up at the doctor and signed something else to him.

“He says,” I explained, still not facing the man, “that he’s ready.”

The doctor started walking towards Hansol and me, and got down on his knees beside the bed. I finally looked up again to get a better look at him and saw that he was an older man, with a bald head and big, round, brown eyes. He lifted a hand and patted my shoulder, and I saw that his nametag read, “Dr. Wermer”.

“I’m sorry to have to do this, son,” he told me quietly before standing back up and going towards the back of the machine, where the cords were plugged into the wall. I watched him, ignoring Hansol, as he reached for a cord. He stopped with his hand on the main plug and looked over at me. “I’ll give you a bit of time to say something to him.”

“Thank you, sir,” I said, clearing the lump in my throat as I finally turned back to Hansol. We both had tears in our eyes as we stared at eachother, before I saw that he was holding his hand out to me. Slowly, I clasped our hands together and brought them back down to his side.

After a deep breath, I told him, “I love you, Hansol hyung.”

He smiled back at me and signed with one hand.  _ I love you too. Take care of yourself for me, okay? Try to be happy for both of us. And Yuta? Promise me you’ll remember that this is what I wanted. _

I nodded back at him with a watery smile, then looked up at doctor. “This won’t hurt him, right? He won’t- he won’t feel anything?”

The doctor shook his head at me. “No, son. We’ve been giving him extra doses of pain relief for a few days now; he won’t feel a thing.”

I looked down at Hansol and smiled at him even as the tears finally spilled over and mouthed, “Okay.”

The doctor pulled the plug on his life support and the machines around Hansol started shutting down with a long  _ beep.  _ The doctor pressed a button on a the computer next to Hansol’s bed and the beeping stopped, then he walked behind me and rubbed my shoulder again. “You’ve got a minute before he’s gone, son. I’ll leave you two alone now.”

I didn’t look away from Hansol as the door closed behind me. Hansol had finally started crying but he looked at me with a smile on his face. “Thank you, Yuta,” he mouthed to me. “For everything.”

I sniffled, wiping my eyes. “Goodbye, hyung... I’m… I’m gonna miss you..”

Hansol smiled at me, but his eyelids were beginning to close and his breaths were getting slower. After a few seconds, his grip on my hand loosened slightly and his body slumped down further in his seat.

_ He finally looks so peaceful, _ I thought bitterly.  _ Now that he’s dying… now that he’s leaving... he doesn’t feel any pain. _

Just as I was beginning to think he had already passed,  his eyes widened and he gasped, staring at something directly over my shoulder. His hand moved below mine for a moment before he gave up and fell back into bed.

I spun around quickly, seeing nothing behind me, and turned back to Hansol who was still staring at the spot on the wall above me. My heart raced in my chest so fast I thought I was having a heart attack. I frantically searched the room, trying to find what had scared him. After a few seconds of not seeing anything, I turned back to him, bewildered. “Hansol?” I asked quickly, reaching up and patting his cheek when he didn’t look back at me.

A few heartbeats later, I realized that Hansol would never look back at me again. The tears in my eyes continued to flow down my face, dropping onto our entangled hands as I leaned over his still body to mourn my friend.

 

…

 

_ (A/N: Sorry Hansol) _

__ In the morning, Sicheng awoke to find that the wire that he tore from his arm last night was back in again. He checked the clock beside him for a second, reading that it was 12:00 in the morning, and felt that his Charge was extremely upset- a pain Sicheng had never hoped to experience in his life.

Panicking, Sicheng called on his Angel form and searched frantically for the Link to him. He flew up to his Charge’s room and found the boy holding the hand of the other human with the barely-there, dark yellow outline.

The other human in the room was staring at the wall beside Sicheng before his gaze slowly rolled over to rest directly on the Angel. The man’s eyes widened upon seeing Sicheng’s form and he begin wildly thrashing on the bed with impossibly wide eyes.. 

Sicheng’s Charge noticed this as well and startled, making the Link flare brighter with his fear. Sicheng instinctively sought out what was making his human afraid, and his Angel form realized that it was the unknown man’s panic that was the cause. He turned to see what was wrong with the other human so he could stop it and make his Charge feel safe again, but the man had already grown still and silent once more.

Sicheng felt no emotion as he stared down at the lifeless body of the dead human. He only cared about his Charge’s pain, as it was suddenly amplified by the man’s death. Cooing in his Angelic voice, Sicheng glided down to his Charge and floated to and fro around him, soothing the sobbing boy.

After a while, he realized that his Charge had fallen asleep due to Sicheng’s calming waves. Sicheng backed away from him and went to float gently in the corner, getting ready to return to his physical form. Before he could completely fade back into his body; howerver, the door to the room opened and a nurse walked in. Sicheng stopped the transformation and watched the woman cautiously, waiting to see what she would do.

The woman stopped in the door and reached up and covered her mouth with her hand, staring directly at Sicheng’s Charge. Then she called for more doctors who came in and helped her take his still-sleeping Charge to the other bed laid against the wall. He watched as they covered the dead human with a white sheet and then rolled his bed out into the hallway.

Intrigued, Sicheng wanted to go follow him, but his energy had been too drained to follow far. Sicheng could only travel far enough to see the nametag of the woman who had taken the corpse before he was forced back into his physical form. 

He jolted up in his bed, gasping and holding his head where it felt as though it had been split open. Being forcefully returned to one’s physical form was excruciatingly painful for all Angels, especially for ones as young as Sicheng. He wouldn’t be able to access his Angel form until it had regained its energy, which worried the boy. How would he guard his Charge if he couldn’t see him?

Ignoring the pain in his skull and the demands of his exhausted body, Sicheng pushed himself out of his bed and ripped the wires and tubes from his skin, doing his best to ignore the extra pain to his already wrecked body. He fell through the door in front of him, and then crawled along the wall to the elevator until he eventually reached his Charge’s room, where he collapsed on the floor with an exhausted sigh.

His magic energy ran wild at finally being so close to his Charge, making the electronics in the room flicker on and off. While he crawled to the chair in the corner of the room, he heard the TV turn on and off constantly with his power, and a human man began talking.

_ “Morning… 23 year… male… attacked… young wo... rampage… killing... injuring… authorities… attacks in other-” _

Sicheng tuned out the sound of the TV as it was only adding onto his headache, and finally reached the chair where he fell into it in a heap of exhaustion. He wrapped his arms around himself tightly and squeezed them together for comfort as he quickly fell asleep.

 

_ (A/N: this chapter is really all over the place. I’m not a huge fan of writing expositional chapters, so this one is a bit rushed. Forgive me. I hope you enjoyed!) _


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot for the life of me figure how to make actual paragraphs on ao3 and it is literally driving me insane. that's what I was trying to do here but as you can see it did not work. if I figure it out in the future I'll update this chapter but I 've been trying for like half an hour to do it and I can feel my sanity leaving my body as we speak. I'm going to bed.

**_Chapter Four_ **

 

_ The Angel’s Charge _

 

Sicheng woke up as someone was touching him. His Angel form, completely healed, sang inside of him as he realized who it was. The Link between them flashed much more brightly for a moment before it dulled out, becoming a brighter, more vibrant shade of blue. Baekhyun’s eyes shot open and he stared up into the face of his Charge.

Sicheng’s Charges eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot as he stared down into the Angel’s eyes with wonder. His mouth fell open as he gazed at Sicheng and his eyes widened slightly. “You-” his voice cracked, and the beautiful sound made Sicheng’s heart race even faster. His Charge continued, “Are you… are you okay?”

Sicheng stared up at the love of his life, heart pounding in his ear drums, and didn’t speak for a while. He was shell-shocked by his Charge’s beauty, and barely felt when his Charge placed his warm, gentle hand in Sicheng’s.

When Sicheng finally noticed the contact, he turned his head and stared down at their entwined hands. The Link was pulsing between them through their fingers and Sicheng thought that he saw his Charge squint slightly; did he feel it as well?

Finally, Sicheng turned his head back up to his Charge as he quietly asked him something in his wonderfully smooth voice. “Who are you?” His voice rolled off like silk, absolutely beautiful and it made Sicheng’s breath hitch.

Sicheng cleared his throat and nodded his head slightly to the man in front of him. “The name I hose is Sicheng Dong.” Sicheng noticed how his Charge’s breath also caught in his throat at the sound of Sicheng’s angelic voice. “I have to know, please- Please tell me your name,” Sicheng begged, squeezing his love’s hand.

His Charge’s Adam’s apple bobbed up as he swallowed and shakily said, “I’m Yuta Nakamoto.”

_ Yuta. _ His soul, ecstatic at learning his Charge’s name, danced inside of him happily. Like before, the energy he produced made the lights flicker in the room and the TV turn on and off before Sicheng calmed himself. He would have to be more careful- he did not have complete control over his powers so soon after Birth.

Yuta jumped at the sudden noise, startled by the malfunctioning machines, and backed away from Sicheng to look at the TV that had been left on when Sicheng had regained control.

Sicheng stood up instantly, and with a grace unknown to any other species, not wanting to be away from his Charge, and took a step quick closer to the human. Yuta turned his eyes up slightly to look at Sicheng as he moved and his mouth opened a small bit, so Sicheng raised his hands in front of him, in the universal sign of peace.

His Charge, though still visibly frightened, didn’t back away from Sicheng as he came closer to the human. Once Sicheng was standing a few inches in front of the human, Yuta cleared his throat again, and spoke. “I… I know you. From my dreams… Are you-” Yutal coughed and shook his head violently. He took a deep breath and raised one arm where he held it close to Sicheng’s face, as if to touch him. He continued, “Are you…are you really an Angel?.”

Sicheng, surprised that Yuta knew about him, slowly nodded his head. “Yes.”

Yuta’s eyes widened a tiny bit. “You… You’re an Angel. You’re  _ my _ Angel.”

Sicheng only nodded, half expecting Yuta to turn and run away, given the human’s current wide-eyed, pale expression.

The two were quiet then, hearts racing audibly in their chests as they stared eachother down. After what felt like an eternity, Yuta’s trembling hand rose and slowly met Sicheng’s cheek. The Angel froze, letting his human explore as he liked, and patiently waited for Yuta to finish.

Yuta opened his mouth to say something and Sicheng’s eyes caught on his lips briefly as he waited. As Yta took a breath to speak, the TV in the corner suddenly blared the jingle of the news station, before beeping and announcing that there was ‘Breaking News’. The two boys turned their heads at the noise, Yuta momentarily forgetting what he wanted to say, and looked to the TV.

A news anchor’s voice came through the speakers. “ _ We interrupt this program to bring you all some shocking news. We’ve just received reports of even more attacks in Las Vegas, now, everyone- this time, at Caesar’s Palace, where a man was said to have fatally wounded a young employee. I’m also hearing that have now been a similar series of attacks in the city of Chicago that took place just this morning, outside an apartment complex on Ashland Avenue, resulting in the deaths of two young men and even their pet golden retriever. ” _

The two men froze, hearts beating, and then Sicheng gently moved Yuta a step back from him, and maneuvered him down onto the bed. Sicheng stood beside the human and looked up at the TV to watch, a sinking feeling growing quickly in his stomach.

The anchor continued,  _ “We will continue to give you updates about these horrific attacks as we learn more information, everyone. Until we do; however, we here at KMTV Omaha advise you to stay inside at all times and to limit your interactions with those who might have been infected by this horrifying disease until further notice. Tune in to KMTV later tonight as the President will be hosting a televised press conference, at 5:00 pm. Signing off, this has been Tyler Louis. Please. Stay safe out there, everyone.” _

  
  


Sicheng and Yuta turned their heads to look at eachother as the show went to commercials. Yuta’s eyes were still rimmed because of his tears, but he stared up at Sicheng with stark confusion, and maybe a hint of panic. “What… what was that?”

Sicheng shook his head at Yuta slowly. “I don’t know… I just got here.” He turned his head and motioned for Yuta to stand up. The other boy hurriedly rose next to Sicheng and grabbed his arm. Sicheng took him over to the window and turned back to him. “Yuta,” Yuta gaze shifted to him again. “Something isn’t right. We should go.”

Sicheng started leading Yuta away but Yuta tugged on their connected hands to get him to stop. “But wait! I have so many questions!”

Sicheng shook his head and pushed the door to the room over, forcing Yuta through it. “Not now, Yuta. We have to leave now. This place- it smells like death.”

The halls were oddly quiet as Sicheng walked in front of Yuta through the halls and towards the elevator. When the doors closed, Sicheng finally relaxed and tried to pull Yuta to him to comfort himself, but Yuta resisted and backed away from him slightly. Sicheng frowned and waited for Yuta to say something.

Yuta didn’t hesitate this time. “Where are we going?”

Sicheng thought over it for a second. He really had no clue. He just knew he had to get Yuta  _ away from there. _ A tug in his soul pulled him from this place, towards something that felt even more strange, but at the same time welcoming. “I don’t know. We have to find my Brothers, please, Yuta, can’t this w-”

“But, Sicheng,” Yuta interrupted hurriedly. “I don’t underst-”

Yuta was cut off by the elevator’s  _ ding _ , signaling that they had reached their floor. Yuta tried to exit first but Sicheng pushed him back against the wall and walked ahead of him, something inside of him still screaming at him to  _ takehimawaytakehimawaytakehimaway... _

“Sicheng, what is it? What’s wrong, why are we in such a hurry?”

The Angel shook his head to clear it, and looked back at Yuta as he pulled him around a corner, leading him quickly down the hall. A woman at the front desk spotted them and frowned sadly at Yuta, calling out to him. “Oh, Yuta, honey. If you ever need anything, you know-”

But Sicheng had pulled them out of the building before they could hear what the woman was saying. Yuta protested heavily at this, but Sicheng ignored him as the voice inside his head grew in volume.

Just as Sicheng had finally pulled Yuta away a bit, into the street, Yuta ripped his arm free and planted his feet firmly so Sicheng couldn’t pull him any further. “Whoa! What are you doing?!!” He snapped angrily, making Sicheng flinch. “Where are you taking me?! You can’t just-”

Sicheng turned to the human and grabbed Yuta’s face between his hands, ever so gently, pleading for Yuta to trust him.. “Yuta,  _ please.  _ We don’t have time for this. I don’t know where we’re going and I don’t know what I’m doing but I have to get you  _ away  _ from here. I don’t know how I know or what I’m supposed to do with you but you have to trust me.” Sicheng stopped to breath and Yuta looked like he was going to start arguing again, so Sicheng, in a spew of fear and frustration, physically silenced him by slamming his hand over his mouth. “Yuta!  I can answer your questions later but now we have to go!” After yelling, Sicheng removed his hands and stared at his human. Yuta was silent for a few seconds, so Sicheng begged, “ _ Please,  _ Yuta _.”  _

Finally, Yuta nodded slowly, and with that, Sicheng grabbed a him and pulled the boy forcefully down the street and away from the building, using a bit of his enhanced strength so Yuta literally could not pull away again.

The Link between the two flared brightly turning to a bright red, signalling to Sicheng that Yuta was afraid and distressed, but Sicheng ignored the ache in his chest for the moment. Yuta didn’t fully trust him, and while that was to be expected from a human, and he understood why, it still stung.

After a few minutes of Sicheng’s fast running, Yuta began to falter in his steps with his exhaustion. Sicheng noticed this and wanted to keep moving away, but he knew his Charge was only human- and weak, judging by how skinny he was- so he lead Yuta to an alleyway and moved him gently against the wall to catch his breath.

Sicheng back was turned to Yuta, though he held one of the human’s hands to comfort him, still on guard. “Sicheng,” Yuta gasped, holding his side with his other hand. “I know I agreed to follow you, but I can’t help it. Please, slow down and talk to me for a second.” Sighing, Sicheng turned to face the wide-eyed human. “How-what... What is happening?”

Yuta sounded so broken and confused and Sicheng was quickly reminded of all that Yuta had been through these past few days. The death of his friend- who Sicheng still didn’t know anything about- had taken a huge toll on the young boy, and from what Sicheng could tell, his life up until that point had not been easy either, seeing just how sickly skinny and pale the human was.

Sicheng took a deep breath, squeezing Yuta hand tightly. “I don’t know, Yuta. I honestly have no idea. I’m so sorry I can’t explain what I feel to you, because you’re just human; I don’t even know what is making me do this.” He brought Yuta’s hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to the skin, letting his Angel out to soothe the poor boy. Yuta’s breath caught in his throat and Sicheng tilted his eyes up to see his face. “All I can tell you right now is that there is just  _ something _ inside me that is screaming at me to get as far away from this place as I can. So, I need you to trust me on this, Yuta; you know I’d never hurt you. Please, I’m asking now, Yuta. Please come with me. I promise I’ll try to answer everything I can when we’re safe, okay? Please.”

Slowly, Yuta’s breathing slowed and his tense frame relaxed, and he finally nodded. Sicheng smiled brightly at him, eyes shining with love though the human gave no indication that he noticed the emotion, and lead the boy farther and farther away from the hospital.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Chapter Five_ **

 

_ The Calling _

“Sicheng,” Yuta said slowly as they stood outside the boy’s apartment complex. Sicheng took quick note of the confusion in the younger man’s voice and turned to him quickly, grabbing his hand again. Yuta looked down at the Angel and brought his phone in between them, showing Sicheng the screen. “I’m not getting any service.”

Sicheng tilted his head to the side. “So? Maybe you just have bad signal. Don’t panic, Yuta,” he smiled for the human’s benefit. “We’ll be leaving soon”

Yuta nodded, relieved that Sicheng didn’t feel like they were in danger at the moment. Though he didn’t understand what was going on, he knew that he could trust Sicheng. “By the way,” he mused shyly as they stepped into the elevator that would lead them to his apartment, “I just wanted to let you know that my apartment… well, it’s not super clean right now.” Sicheng turned to the boy who was looking down at the ground, rubbing his neck awkwardly, and stared. 

Yuta continued, “I, uh.. I haven’t been home in a while. With Hansol being as sick as he was, I’ve been more-or-less living on campus. When school got out for the summer, I started sleeping at the hospital… It’s probably been close to four months since I’ve stopped actually staying here. I kept paying rent, though, because I had all my stuff here and I wasn’t sure when Hansol would get-” his voice cracked “-better and I wanted everything to be here when he finally got back…”

The elevator dinged and they walked down the narrow hall together, stopping just outside Yuta’s door. Before Sicheng could reach for the handle, Yuta grabbed his arm to stop him. Sicheng looked up at the taller man in confusion before Yuta explained, “Wait- just… It’s stupid, but I don’t... “ he sighed, reaching for the handle himself. “I’m really sorry for the mess.”

Sicheng let Yuta walk in ahead of him, then stepped around him to look. He tried to hold in his wince, didn’t think he was too successful, and was grateful that Yuta still had his back turned to him. As Yuta lead him further into his apartment, Sicheng’s heart grew heavier and heavier with sadness.

Yuta hadn’t been lying when he said his apartment was a mess. Not only was there dirt and piles of trash discarded about- Sicheng could understand that; Yuta was a young man- but the apartment itself looked to be in shatters. The single window he could see had a sizable hole in the center, as if someone had thrown something through it; the couch in the middle of the room was old and had holes in the fabric; there was a TV stand, but no TV; the kitchen was tiny- with a single counter and fridge- no sink or stove- the walls were bare and covered in cracks and cobwebs, and a light odor portrayed from what he assumed was the bathroom.

Sicheng reached a hand up and lightly covered his nose as his senses picked up traces of pneumonia and death- something had literally died in here while Yuta had been away. “You won’t be staying here anymore.”

Yuta suddenly turned towards him, eyebrows furrowed. “Why not?” His gaze lingered on the hand Sicheng was holding to his mouth but he didn’t comment on it- though his cheeks turned noticeably more pink. “I know it’s a little dirty, but now that you’ll be here, I think we could probably get back on top of the rent-”

Sicheng held up his other hand to silence him. Yuta quieted and Sicheng took his hand away from his mouth to speak. “Something is dead in here, and the air will make you sick. Get your things, we’re leaving.”

Sicheng then walked past a confused, but quiet, Yuta and pushed his way through a door that lead to a bedroom. “Wait!” he heard Yuta call, and suddenly he was pulled back into Yuta’s arms. Instinctively, he pushed Yuta further behind him- where he almost stumbled backwards through the door- and crouched down defensively, glancing around the room for an unknown attack.

Suddenly, Yuta started laughing behind him. Confused, Sicheng turned to the human, shocked at the noise. Then, he straightened and stared in wonder.

When Yuta laughed, he  _ laughed.  _ Knee slapping, eye squinting, loud pants of air between each loud boom- and his  _ smile.  _ Sicheng had never seen something so beautiful. He vowed that he would do whatever it took for Yuta to always have a smile on his face. 

It lasted only a few seconds before Yuta had calmed himself enough to stand straight again. “Sorry,” he coughed out, still trying to regain his breath. “I needed that. You should have seen your face.” He smiled softly, and reached down to grab Sicheng’s hand again, making the Angel shiver. “I didn’t mean to scare you. It’s just that… That was Hansol’s room, and um.. It’s kind of private?. I didn’t mean to freak you out or anything.”

Sicheng blushed, feeling instantly ridiculous. He nodded in understanding, and cleared his throat. “Oh. Um… Well, where is your room? You’ll need to get your stuff.”

Yuta dropped Sicheng’s hand and crossed his arms over his chest. “Sicheng, where are we going? I understand why we can’t stay  _ here _ , in the apartment… kind of… but where else would we go? I don’t know if you know this, but I can’t really afford much else right now.”

Sicheng titled his head to the side in confusions- a strange habit he had developed- and asked, “Why don’t we find your parents? We should-” At the word “parents”, Yuta let out a grunt and straightened his back.

His eyes instantly hardened and his shoulders tensed in anger. “No. Not  _ them _ ” he spat the word in anger, then turned and walked towards another door, pushing it open forcefully as he disappeared inside, slamming the door so hard the frame rattled- though in a place like this, maybe that was the case for all the doors..

“Yuta?” Sicheng questioned, a bit hurt by his tone. He slowly walked towards where Yuta had disappeared and raised a hand to knock lightly when Yuta opened the door and leaned against the frame, staring at the ground for a bit. Sicheng waited patiently.

Yuta sighed, running a hand through his hair as he went to sit on his bed. “I’m sorry, again, Sicheng,” he apologized genuinely. “I don’t have… the best relationship with my parents.” When Yuta opened his mouth to question, Sicheng held up a hand to him to stop. “I don’t want to talk about it now, Sicheng. Not today.”

Sicheng heard his voice break at the end and pursed his lips unhappily. He approached Yuta on the bed with open arms, but put them down when Yuta turned his head and sighed. “Sicheng, I just… not now, please? I appreciate the thought, but I just want to be alone right now, okay?” When Sicheng didn’t move back, Yuta looked up at him with watery eyes. His voice cracked, “Please? I’ll come get you in a bit.”

Finally, Sicheng sighed and nodded his head, turning around and slowly walking back into the hallway between the two bedrooms. He heard Yuta sniffle behind him, and every instinct in his body told him to go soothe the poor human boy, but he held himself back.

_ He needs to deal with this by himself,  _ Sicheng thought to himself as he dusted off a spot on the couch and plopped down onto it.  _ I think. Maybe. Yeah. _

 

…..

 

When Yuta finally emerged from his room, bag packed and eyes red and puffy again, he found Sicheng asleep on the couch. The Angel had explained that until his strength could catch up to his Angelic form, he would be weaker and would need to sleep a lot- he kept using the term  _ NewBorn _ to describe himself and Yuta was starting to agree.

Yuta was surprised when he rounded the couch to get a good look at the boy, seeing how he was sprawled out on his makeshift bed, eyes slightly opened and staring up towards his forehead, with a very light snore escaping his plump lips. It was then that he finally noticed that Sicheng was still wearing the loose-fitting scrubs the hospital had given him before they both left and hurriedly went into Hansol’s old room and grabbed a new outfit for him.

He held his breath as he entered Hansol’s room, before arriving at his dresser where a picture of he and his ex-girlfriend, Wendy, was taped proudly to the wood. “Hey, buddy,” Yuta whispered, gazing at the photo. “Hope you don’t mind, but I’ve got a friend here and he’s going to need some of your old clothes, okay?” After waiting for a few seconds-  _ for what? _ \- he opened the drawers and searched around for some clothes to wear. He finally pulled out a small, red T-shirt with a pair of black skinny jeans- the only things that looked like they would fit Sicheng- and exited his friend’s room.

As he clutched the clothes in his hands, he thought,  _ Hansol didn’t used to be that small.  _ He felt another wave of sadness crash over him and heard Sicheng make an unhappy noise in his sleep, so he forced it down and hurried to Sicheng, gently shaking his arm.

“Sicheng~” he called softly, watching the Angel’s lips form an unhappy pout as his eyes slowly peeled open to gaze at the human. Yuta smiled at the drowsy look in his eyes and pulled on his arm to get him to sit up, then placed the clothes in his lap as Sicheng reached above his head to stretch. “You need to change. I got these for you. They were Hansol’s.”

Sicheng’s gaze turned to him sharply, full of concern. He lowered his arms and touched the clothes in his lap, feeling the softness, and quietly said, “Um… Thank you, Yuta. Do you think you’re ready to go now?”

Yuta hesitated for a few seconds before nodding quickly. “Yeah, I think so.”

 

…..

 

“We need to get gas,” was all Yuta said as they entered his old pickup truck, Sicheng having to duck a bit to enter the passenger’s side. “I don’t know where we’re gonna go, but we’re almost on empty so we’ve gotta make this quick.”

Sicheng nodded, shifting in his seat so he could reach the safety belt and strap it across himself. Then he stared in amazement as Yuta slowly backed out of the parking lot and shifted into drive as they pulled down the street.

Yuta noticed his gaze and chuckled. “What? Don’t you know how to drive? That lady did, the one you got your… um,  _ you,  _ from. What are you looking at?”

Sicheng looked up at Yuta and shrugged. “I know how, of course. I’ve just never done it, and I didn’t get to see the woman do it either. It’s just…new..” As Yuta shifted gears to go down the highway, Sicheng spoke again. “I know this probably sounds really weird, but… would you mind if I just watch you be human for a little bit? I’m sorry if I sound stupid, but I’m… not. And I want to see what it’s like.”

Yuta was a bit taken back by Sicheng’s request, but after a few seconds, he nodded. “Sure, um… Sorry to say I’m not the most interesting human out there for you to watch.” Sicheng went to assure him that  _ actually Yuta was the single most interesting thing Sicheng had ever seen  _ but Yuta suddenly took his hand off the wheel and pointed at something in front of them “Holy crap! Look at all those birds!”

Sicheng jumped at Yuta’s loud voice, then turned his gaze towards the window where he saw a massive flock of birds taking off from a park several blocks down the street. The sky seemed to blacken, with a strange red cloud billowing up into the sky, too far away for Yuta to have seen.

Something had just exploded.

“Yuta,” he said shakily, eyes glued to the spot in the sky where the birds were taking off like rockets. Feeling sick to his stomach with fear, Sicheng reached up to where Yuta hand was still pointing towards the sky and grabbed his large wrist. “Drive.”

 

…..

 

“Are you coming in?” Yuta’s head popped back inside the cab after he had filled the tank all the way back up. He reached into the center console and grabbed a few stray bills- then looked up at Sicheng as he had not answered him yet. Sicheng was staring down at Yuta silently, the same feeling now caught in his throat as he looked at the human. “Sicheng? You okay?”

Sicheng shook his head  _ no _ , and then pushed the door to his right open. “Hold on, I’m coming with you. Don’t go far.”

Once inside, Yuta started taking them over to the aisles, saying something about how Sicheng could pick out some snacks for the road while Yuta went to pay but Sicheng wasn’t really listening. The nagging feeling had completely taken over his mind and he still didn’t understand what it was. He was practically glued to the human, and was periodically checking things out with his Angel form.

Most of the humans in this store had dark yellow outlines.

Suddenly, just as Yuta was about to leave him to go pay, a man with black hair and stylish clothes walked inside and Sicheng’s Angel took flight inside of him- straight at the man.

Sicheng gasped from where his body was stuck, watching as the man suddenly turned towards Sicheng with wide eyes and his mouth open. As soon as Sicheng’s Angel touched him, the man let out a huge smile and opened his arms to the Angel

Just as Sicheng’s Angel returned to him and the boy gasped for breath, the unknown man reached them and called out. “Brother.” Sicheng blinked over at the man, pulling Yuta completely behind him protectively before his mind caught up to what his Angel was telling him.

Sicheng blinked once, and a bright green light shone behind his eyelids- right where the other Angel was standing. When he had calmed himself enough, he relaxed his stand and opened his arms to his Brother, walking into the hug with a smile of familiarity on his face. “Brother,” Sicheng finally returned, squeezing the man to him tightly.

When he finally pulled back, the man was still beaming at him happily. “Brother,” he said. “My name is Suho. I was wondering when I’d finally get to meet you.”

Sicheng bowed his head to his elder respectfully as he pulled away to stand next to Yuta who was looking at the two of them like they had grown two heads. “I’m Sicheng. He” he gestured to Yuta with his hand “is my Charge. Yuta.”

Suho walked closer to Yuta and reached up to the taller boy to pat his shoulder. “Don’t be afraid, human,” he smiled calmly and Yuta’s heartbeat slowed instantly. “I’m not going to hurt you. I’m an Angel, like Sicheng.”

Yuta’ s eyes widened in understanding and he completely relaxed his tense muscles. “There are more of you? Oh, thank god. You scared the absolute sh-”

“Suho?” An accented voice called from the front of the store. The three men turned their heads towards the sound and saw a man with golden hair approaching them over the aisles. Suho instantly backed away from Sicheng and Yuta and met the man at the end with his hand out to grab his.

Suho gently pulled the man out to where the two boys could see him. He was a little taller than Suho, with a slim, muscular build. A deep-set dimple in his right cheek caught Sicheng attention as it showed even when he wasn’t smiling.

Suho turned the boy to them and said, “This is Yixing- but you can call him Lay. He’s my Charge.”

Lay turned his head and looked at Sicheng curiously. “So I guess you’re the other Angel Suho wanted to meet?”

After a second, Sicheng shrugged. “I guess so. Brother,” he turned his gaze back to the older boy, “that feeling- the  _ explosion! _ What was it? Did you see it too?”

Suho smiled, but Sicheng caught a strange look in the Angel’s eyes before Suho turned his head and told Lay, “Why don’t you and Yuta get to know each other for a while? Sicheng and I have to talk about some Angel things for a bit. Go pick out some snacks.”

Lay looked up at Yuta with his eyebrow raised, but Yuta was a little hesitant to leave Sicheng’s side. “Go on,” Sicheng smiled up at Yuta he didn’t want to be apart from his Charge, either, but he knew he needed to hear what Suho had to say.

With Sicheng’s command, Yuta turned his head and motioned for Lay to follow him as they walked to the other side of the store- near the ice cream. 

_ Of course. _

A hand grabbed Sicheng’s arm and moved him into the corner of the store. “Brother,” Suho started, letting his true fearful emotions into the air. Sicheng’s Angel tensed unhappily within him as it sensed his Brother’s distress. Suho continued, “Have you seen the news at all since you got here?”

Sicheng nodded quickly. “Yeah, a little at the hospital. The TV-”

Interrupting, Suho shushed the younger boy. “What did they say? Where were the last attacks?”

Sicheng racked his brain for the information. “They… um, the news just said there were attacks in Las Vegas a few days ago. And a few more in Chicago. Brother, what-”

“Tell me, Brother. Has Yuta been in contact with… a dead body recently?”

Taken aback, Sicheng stuttered. “Yes? That’s why we were in the hospital. His friend…” Suho’s eyes had widened, Sicheng had never been more confused. “What’s wrong? Why do you want to know if-”

Suho just stared at Sicheng for a few moments as if he was trying to solve a math problem, then looked down in sadness. “Then I think he’s been infected, too. This is not good.”

Sicheng reached over, grabbing Suho’s shoulder to stop the boy from turning away from him. “Brother,” he forced over the lump in his throat, “What’s wrong?”

Suho looked over to where Yuta and Lay were still getting snacks; Yuta was smiling happily at Lay and holding a basket of various chips and bags of dried meat and Lay was holding a carrier of four large ice cream shakes. 

“There is a… sickness, Sicheng, that is spreading through the country. It’s spread by coming into contact with a dead person- I don’t know much about it. But it is horrible, it causes humans to do horrible things. Things that I didn’t even think were possible.” Suho sighed, and the depression in his voice made Sicheng want to cry. “...Lay is infected, too. I found him pulling a dead human away from a burning car.”

“Brother,” Sicheng started after Suho hadn’t said anything else, “this sickness… what does it do? Our Charges-”

Suho turned his head back to Sicheng. “It doesn’t kill our Charges. With our help, their immune systems will fight off most of it; but it will weaken them to other illnesses. Lay was sick for almost three entire months, once. But that’s not all.” Suho’s shoulders tensed up. “Lay’s mother was already dying when I came. Lay was taking care of her at his house because he couldn’t afford to take her to a hospital. I sensed that there was something wrong- more so than the effects of drugs- and sent Lay out to get some medicine for her.

“She died that night, shortly after he left. I was in the room with her. Forty-three seconds after I felt her heartbeat stop, she sprung up from the bed and tried to rip my throat out. With her teeth.” Suho then pulled at the collar of his shirt and revealed a large, dark bite mark that had healed over but left a deep scar, maring the otherwise flawless skin..

Sicheng gasped in shock, then quickly covered his mouth with his hand as Yuta turned his head to him at the noise with a concerned expression. Swallowing his horror, Sicheng let his hands fall and smiled for Yuta’s benefit, grateful that at that moment Lay was pulling the boy towards the register.

Suho let his collar snap back against his neck as Sicheng looked at him again. “I don’t think the disease actually killed her- I think she died from a fever- her immune system couldn’t fight it. This disease doesn’t kill humans; but it makes them monsters. The bite won’t kill us, of course, but it hurt- bad.” Suho shuddered. “Lay felt my pain so he ran back in and dragged her off of me. She tried going for him, too… I had to kill her.”

Sicheng frowned. “You had to kill her? What happened next?”

Before Suho could respond, Lay and Yuta returned with bags of snacks and drinks. Yuta instantly walked back to Sicheng’s side and showed him the contents of his bags with a smile- the simple joy of food Yuta had left a bittersweet taste in Sicheng’s mouth. “I didn’t know what you wanted so I grabbed a bunch of different stuff, if that’s okay?”

Sicheng nodded with a bright smile up at the giant boy, taking the bags from him, but reached inside and pulled out a stick of beef jerky. He stiffly handed it to Yuta, having been reminded that Yuta had not been eating well recently, and the knowledge that he was now more prone to illness made him more pushy than usual.

Yuta was talking to Lay; however, so Sicheng gently placed the candy in his open palm instead. His large hand closed around the bar and he turned to the Angel. “Hey, Sicheng, Lay told me he and Suho are leaving town, too. Can we go with them?”

Turning to his Brother, Sicheng raised one eyebrow in question. Suho smiled at Yuta, then turned his head to Lay. “Suho and I have a lot to talk about, still. So I think we will- for a while, at least. You don’t mind, do you?”

Lay shook his head quietly.  _ He wasn’t much of a talker. _ “Alright,” Suho said, turning back to Yuta. “I was actually just going to take Lay to meet our Brother, Jungwoo. He’s actually only a little bit older than you, Sicheng.”

They finally exited the store and Sicheng breathed in the fresh air, away from the scent of death plaguing the store, and transferred a few snacks and drinks Suho gave them, and followed Lay’s vehicle down the road.

Sicheng noticed, grimly, that Suho was speeding away from where Sicheng had seen the explosion.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its getting juicy bois


	6. Chapter 6

**_Chapter Six_ **

 

_ The Beginning _

They had been on the road for hours, stopping only once to refuel. When they had gone to pay; however, Yuta hadn’t had enough money to cover the gas, so Suho had paid for him. Ever since that moment, Yuta had barely spoken a word as he followed behind Suho. Sicheng had tried to get him to speak- he’d had so many questions about Sicheng and Angels before- but now he was silent.

Sicheng assumed he was tired, so he offered to drive for him. It would have been his first time behind a wheel, but the woman who had given him her knowledge had been driving for over 20 years, so he probably had more ‘experience’ than Yuta. But Yuta had only sighed, telling Sicheng that he didn’t want anyone else driving his truck- he’d laughed, called it a human thing- but Sicheng knew there was something else to it. He hadn’t pressed any further, and Yuta hadn’t made any attempts to speak to him since.

Ahead of them, Suho signaled that he was turning right, into the parking lot of a hotel, so Yuta pulled up next to him and got out without a word. Sicheng sighed and followed him out a heartbeat later, and walked around the front to stand next to the human as they waited for Suho and Lay to get out.

Once they had all of their things- Suho and Lay carrying several more bags than Yuta- they entered the hotel lobby. Suho had made reservations for two separate rooms, thankfully, and they parted ways as Sicheng and Yuta’s was a floor about the two. “We’ll be up there in a second,” Suho assured them. “We need to take a shower, and it looks like Yuta could eat.” He smiled and looked over at Lay, standing by the door to their room.

Lay spoke up, finally. “I actually used to live around here when I was a kid. Hated it. But there’s a place I know that’s pretty cheap and it’ll fill you up. It’s not far, either.”

“Go get settled in,” Suho smiled and Sicheng was sure it was for Yuta’s benefit as the human seemed to relax more. Lay then grabbed Suho’s arm and pulled him in the room, closing the door gently behind him.

The two stood there in silence for a second until Sicheng spoke. “Are you tired, Yuta? Let’s go take a nap.” He took a step forward, towards the elevator down the hall.

Yuta, thankfully, just followed behind him.

Once they entered their room, Sicheng lead Yuta to the bed where the human fell on top of the covers and closed his eyes, trying to sleep. Sicheng watched sadly for a few seconds before he knelt on the floor to take off Yuta’s tennis shoes, removed his own, and climbed onto the bed beside him. He was still afraid the human was going to reject him- the room only had one bed but he’d sleep on the floor if Yuta asked him to. But, besides tensing for a second at the unexpected touch, Yuta said nothing for a long while.

Finally, Yuta turned to face Sicheng on the bed, staring at him silently. Sicheng waited patiently. “Something’s happening, isn’t it?” He started quietly. “Something bad, and you don’t want to tell me.” He paused, and Sicheng shrugged, the knot in his throat too big to even consider speaking. Yuta sighed, frustrated, and shook his head. “I trust you, Sicheng. I do. I know you’re here to help me, so I won’t ask again.”

Sicheng reached up and smoothed his hand over the frown lines on Yuta’s forehead, pushing waves of calm into the human as he did so. “Thank you, Yuta. But believe me when I say that I don’t know what’s going on. There’s just… I get this feeling inside me- an instinct- when there’s something dangerous going on. It kind of messes with my head. It, uh… makes it harder to be human when my Angel takes over.”

Yuta was quiet, processing this information, before he blinked up at Sicheng and asked, “Your Angel… can you tell me about him? It?”

Sicheng smiled, stroking Yuta’s cheek slowly with his thumb. “I guess the correct term would be ‘it’. Hm… where to start. Well, you know that I need to sleep a lot. It’s because I’m a Newborn- less than a week old. It’s getting better, though. Suho says when I mature, I’ll only need to sleep as much as you do.”

“Why? You’re not human.” Yuta winced. “Wait-sorry. That sounded mean.”

Sicheng shook his head. “It wasn’t; I’m not. I need to sleep because my body is human. Same with needing to eat and such. Physically, I am human; my body needs all the care that yours would. I can’t die from not eating or sleeping, but I will get sick, like you would if you were starving. Don’t worry, Yuta. I’m not going anywhere.” Sicheng smiled brightly and the human’s mouth quirked up for a second before falling flat again.

Yuta frowned. “You’re immortal?” The human seemed to sadden at the thought.

Sicheng shook his head quickly. “Not quite. The only way for Angels to die is for our Charges to die. Once you’re gone, I’ll return to the Tree-” Yuta frowned even harder, very confused. “It’s what created me. I don’t think it’s really a tree- I don’t know, I’ve never seen it. Well, I have, obviously, but I didn’t have a brain so I- you know what, it’s not important. When you die, I die, and I’ll go back to where I came from.”

Yuta looked like he was going to argue, to demand an explanation that Sicheng literally could not provide, but then he thankfully changed the subject. “So, if I were to die of old age…”

Sicheng nodded. “Because my body is human, I will get older with you. If you want, you can think of me as 20 years old; that’s the age I made my body look.”

“Why  _ did _ you make yourself look like that?” Yuta winced again. “God, I’m sorry. That was rude.”

Sicheng laughed. “No, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize to me. I look like this because it’s what you would have wanted.”

Yuta froze, eyes narrowed in- surprise? Anger?- and his voice grew very quiet. “What do you mean?”

Sicheng realized he had upset the human, but hadn’t he asked? He had given an honest answer. He frowned, hurt and confusion stinging his chest- he was human, he had emotions and Yuta kept hurting him. “I… what?” He asked, for lack of something better to say.

“What do you mean, that’s what I wanted you to look like?” Shockingly, the human seemed to get angrier as he spoke. He had now risen from the bed slightly, leaning down on his forearms, frowning at Sicheng.

Sicheng was quiet, and when he spoke his voice was small. “You… your dreams. This is what I looked like in your dreams. I thought- I thought this would make you happy? It’s what you wanted in a partner. That’s what all Angels do- we pick the form that is most pleasing to our Charges, to make them happy.”

Yuta scoffed and turned quickly, so his back was facing the Angel. “Maybe that would have made me happy before my parents disowned me, huh? You’re always in my head, but I guess you missed that extremely important detail.” Sicheng could hear the venom in Yuta’s voice. “What good is an Angel who picks the one thing that would-” he was cut off by Sicheng’s hand grabbing his nape tightly, but gently.

Sicheng would never hurt Yuta.

However, at the moment, he was very upset- or maybe that wasn’t the right word. Something stronger, angrier. He was pissed. So, unable to speak through the pain and sadness crushing him, he screamed  **SLEEP** through the bond, pushing the command to the tips of his fingers and into Yuta’s brain, forcing him to obey. Yuta was out in the next breath.

Shaking, tears welling in his eyes at the human’s harsh words, Sicheng slid from the bed and moved into his own as he waited for Suho and Lay to return.

 

…

 

Yuta was silent all through dinner. Sicheng had tried to get him to speak, to say  _ anything _ , and while he could feel his emotions, he had no idea what he was thinking about. Yuta was either very sad or very angry- the emotions flipped so often they were starting to blend together into one big mash of upset. But Sicheng didn’t know what to do. When he’d followed Yuta to the bathroom to talk about it, the human had just stared at him silently until Sicheng had slumped his way back to the table.

He didn’t dare bring it up to Suho; he wouldn’t think of talking behind his Charge’s back, but he needed answers. It was killing him.

As they left the restaurant, Yuta having eaten both of their meals himself, after Sicheng’s insistence, Sicheng swore they would talk about what had happened at the hotel, no matter what Yuta said.

So, you can imagine his surprise when he exited their shared bathroom to see Yuta crying on the edge of his bed. Sicheng instantly hurried to his side, sitting next to him, and pulled the human into his embrace. Yuta only cried harder at this, and gave a small attempt to move away from him before he brought his arms up behind Sicheng and clutched the Angel to him.

Sicheng was stroking his hair between the fingers of one hand, and rubbing up and down his back with the other, whispering soothing words to the human. He thought he heard Yuta saying something- or trying to- around his sobs, but he wasn’t really paying attention. Nothing mattered more than making the horrible sounds stop coming from his human.

Yuta started pushing a little harder to get away from Sicheng, but he would stop and pull the Angel closer again every few seconds. Sicheng waited, asking the human “What’s wrong?” softly every so often, just to say something; he wasn’t really expecting an answer.

After what felt like forever, but had actually only been about ten minutes, Sicheng had counted the seconds, Yuta’s mumblings started to take form in the word, “Sorry”, flowing repeatedly from his lips. “I’m so sorry, Sicheng. I’m sorry. I-” but that’s all Yuta got out before his voice cracked and he started crying again.

Sicheng only nodded his head, chin rubbing against Yuta’s hair, and held the boy tighter in his arms.

Talking could wait.

 

…

 

Later, Yuta and Sicheng were laying on the bed, the human’s head pressed softly against the other’s chest. Yuta had refused to release Sicheng since the incident, and every time the Angel tried to look at Yuta’s face, he would hide it in Sicheng’s chest. He was currently curled up with the Angel, staring silently at the wall. The tears had finally stopped flowing, thankfully, and it seemed exhaustion was setting in.

Sicheng hadn’t tried to ask Yuta about it after Yuta had pushed him down and climbed on top of him; he’d been too busy trying to console the boy. Trying to push calm energy through their bond had no effect; Yuta had figured out how to block the connection on his end and had shut Sicheng out. He’d stopped trying after Yuta had begged, “I know what you’re doing. Please… just stop. I need to work through my own emotions without you throwing yours in.” 

That had stung. After he said it, Yuta’s eyes had widened and he’d sputtered a barely-coherent apology, which had somehow lead to their current state.

Sicheng was quite content to stay like this for the rest of his life, if he was being honest. He almost wished Yuta hadn’t just shifted so he was now looking into the Angel’s eyes. But he knew they needed to talk about what just happened, so he stared expectantly at Yuta.

“I…” Yuta started. “I’m really sorry.”

He’d said those three words so often in the past 20 minutes, they were starting to sound like a different language. “I’m going to need more than that,” Sicheng said and Yuta flinched slightly.

Yuta nodded and moved slightly, trying to sit up. The Angel shifted them both so they were seated across from each other, so Yuta could look at Sicheng more comfortably. Yuta took a moment to collect himself before he began to speak again. “I don’t know what to say to make up for- no. I can’t apologize enough for what I said to you. That was… it was uncalled for. You didn’t deserve it, and I’m sor-”

Sicheng cut him off- if his tone was a little sharp well he couldn’t help it. “Stop apologizing to me and get to the point. We’re not going anywhere until you tell me what happened back there.”

Yuta nodded, and Sicheng saw a stray tear run down the tracks on his cheek. For once, though, he wasn’t too inclined to wipe it from the human’s face.

“Okay. I’ll just start from the beginning.” The human took a deep breath, and Sicheng leaned forward intently. “When I was 17, I dated a girl in my older sister’s class- a freshman in college. Sara. We’d been dating for about a year before I found out she was seeing someone on the side. I guess it made sense, in a way.” Yuta smiled bitterly. “We hardly saw eachother anymore, with her in college two hours away. It still hurt, though. A lot.

“I found out from a friend of mine, because it was his brother she had cheated on me with. I didn’t want to believe him at first, but he showed me pictures of the two of them together that someone had put in the college yearbook. They were kissing.” 

Sicheng reached over and took the human’s hand, curling their fingers together in a show of comfort. Yuta smiled softly at the Angel and held on tightly. He continued, “So I was going to get revenge. I didn’t let on that I knew she had cheated, so the next time we had sex, I went through her phone after she was asleep and got the guy’s number. His name was Reed. She left and I started messaging him a few days later, pretending to be one of Sara’s friends looking for a rebound after a breakup.

“At first, it was just fun to see the guy start drooling over the fake pictures I sent him of girls I got online, until I started getting some back. Of him. It was… really weird. But I kind of liked it. It was around then I broke things off with Sara, and I actually started to… like? Reed? So, I came clean and told him I was a dude, totally expecting him to flip and try to find me and kill me.

“But then he said, ‘I know. You’re Yuta.’ and I freaked. I found out later that my friend, his brother, had told him about me and what I’d been doing and he’d known the whole time. He was actually really cool about the whole thing and I thought that was the end of it, until he asked if I wanted to hook up with him.” Yuta stopped for a second and put his head in his hands.

“I’m not proud to say that I said yes. I drove up to his dorm and we had sex, and then it happened again. And again. And again. It was fun, and it helped me forget about Sara. Somehow, I knew all along what was bound to happen, but I was sure I could handle the whole no-strings-attached thing.

“But I couldn’t. I started asking for more. If we could go out, maybe see a movie? ‘No thanks, bro,’ is what he’d say. I’d ask if he wanted something to eat when I went out somewhere and he’d say, ‘No it’s cool. I already ate.’ Stuff like that. It was always, ‘No thanks, bro. No thanks, dude. Nah, dude, it’s fine’. I knew he was using me, but I deluded myself into thinking I could change his mind if I just tried hard enough. I didn’t want to lose him; sex with him was literally the best I’d ever had and I didn’t think I would ever get any better. I was happy. Or, happy enough.

“But one day, his roommate walked in on me giving him a blowjob. And it went downhill fast. He started telling everyone that he’d taken a dare, got one of his friends in on it and they told the entire school about how he’d been paid to get me to suck his dick. I was a freshman in college at that point, I’d literally just started like, a month before then. I had gotten in on a scholarship, full ride. I’d been doing great, had lots of friends. It didn’t matter. No one looked at me the same. People who knew Reed called me horrible, horrible names, kicked me around, stole my stuff and gave it back to me ruined, stuff like that.” Sicheng had long since started crying for his human, and reached up to stroke the boy’s cheek, but Yuta stopped him and held his hands even tighter, shaking his head sharply.

“No, let me finish. My grades started plummeting, even the teachers had heard about it and most of them refused to even acknowledge me in their classes. I tried to move back home but word had reached my parents, too. My dad told me if he ever saw me again, he’d kill me. My mom just cried, and somehow, that hurt the most. The only thing that kept me going was my sister. She stuck up for me, took a good bit of the crap they were giving me for me, and offered to let me move in with her once she was done with school and had a place of her own. But that would take years; she was going to be a doctor and I knew I didn’t have that long.

“So, I dropped out. Started to work odd jobs in town to save money to get off the streets, until I met Hansol. He was a senior in college and he’d heard about what happened to me. He offered me a job at his bar, and let me stay in his apartment with him as long as I pulled my weight. He was my best friend.” Yuta’s voice cracked again and he looked up at the ceiling, willing away any tears that were forming. Still looking up at the ceiling, he said, “The reason I asked about why you made your body look like that… It’s because that’s what Reed looks like. Every detail. Even after all this time, the fact that he is what I want my partner to look like, that he’s the one I dreamt about for  _ years _ , sickens me. That’s why I freaked out on you, Sicheng. And please believe me when I wish I could take it all back. Everything.”

Sicheng was quiet for a few seconds, digesting everything Yuta had just told him. Finally, he reached out and turned Yuta’s face down to look at him. He stared straight into Yuta’s eyes as he said, “I know you’ve had it rough, Yuta. But I wouldn’t have you any other way. If none of that had ever happened to you, I wouldn’t be here right now. We wouldn’t be together. Think of it that way.”

Yuta took a couple deep breaths, visibly trying to compose himself before he lifted his hands and put them on top of Sicheng’s, still cradling his face. “Thank you.”

Sicheng smiled at the human. Or, maybe smirked. “If it’s any consolation, we can’t make our bodies in the image of someone who is alive, in case it confuses our Charges. Reed is dead. If he wasn’t, though, I would have killed him.” Of course, he wouldn't have really killed him. It was against his nature. Maybe he would have just hurt him a lot. Yeah, that.

Yuta’s eyes widened slightly and he took in a gasping breath at the venom in Sicheng’s voice. Then, he relaxed and reached forward, rubbing his thumb along the Angel’s cheek. “That may or may not have made me feel better. Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap I'm so sorry about the wait. Life was really testing me. Long story short, I was looking for a full-time job, almost got sued by a debt collector, and then I was looking for an apartment. Good news: I got the job, am not being sued, and got the apartment. Go me! Anyway, hope you enjoyed! <3


	7. Chapter 7

**_Chapter Seven_ **

 

_ R.I.P Different Chapter Titles I Spend Too Long Trying to Come up With Them so No More _

Sicheng was just finishing getting ready by the time Yuta finally woke up in the bed beside him. The Angel stopped tying his shoe and stared at the human silently as he woke, flopping over onto his side to look at Sicheng. “What-” Yuta’s voice cracked slightly so he cleared his throat. “What time is it?”

Sicheng glanced at the hotel clock between their two beds for a second. “Six Forty-Three.” He looked back at the human who was slowly pushing himself into a sitting position. “I let you sleep in a bit because you looked so tired. Did you have another nightmare?”

Yuta flinched, still not quite used to the Angel’s bluntness. He didn’t like to show weakness, even though he knew Sicheng would never do anything to hurt him. It was another ‘human thing’, he’d explained to Sicheng last time he’d asked about his random night terrors. “Um.. Yeah. I did. Sorry. Did I keep you up?”

“No.” A one word response. Yep. Sicheng was still mad at him.

Yuta winced, then closed his eyes tightly as he ripped the blanket off himself and moved his legs to the side so he was sitting, facing Sicheng. “Are you okay?” He knew the answer, but what else was he supposed to say?

“You would sleep easier if I-”

“No, Sicheng,” Yuta frowned, growing angry. “I already told you- I don’t like-”

Sicheng cut him off sourly. “-You don’t want me to poke around in your head. Fine. Whatever. That’s okay. It’s not like as your guardian angel, I’m supposed to help you or anything. Oh, no. I was just sent to you to put up with your sh-” Sicheng cut himself off, and looked down at his shoes angrily. He took a short breath, and Yuta saw his fists clench at his sides. “I’m going out.” Sicheng said quietly. “Suho and I are going to stop at the store one last time before we get out of town for more supplies. Don’t go anywhere.” He stood up and started to turn away from Yuta, but stopped and turned his head around with a glare. “You know, I’m starting to think the Tree made a mistake.”

Yuta felt as though a knife had just been plunged into his heart. “Sicheng, n-” the human started to stand up, but Sicheng was already at the door. “Sicheng!”

Sicheng didn’t even look back.

When Sicheng finally met up with his Brother, the forced smile he put on his face hurt more than it had yesterday.

 

…

 

The two Angels had just paid for their last-minute shopping spree and Sicheng was starting to feel a little sorry. He knew Suho had picked up on something as the Angel was giving him a weird look, but hadn’t yet brought it up to him.

Once they had parked Suho’s trunk and were grabbing the bags, Suho finally said, “Sicheng. You need to remember that Yuta is human.” Suho waited for a beat, probably to give Sicheng a chance to say something but the Angel remained silent as he gathered more and more bags. Suho continued after a second. “The humans… they’re different from us. Of course. They have flaws. And sometimes, those flaws can be hard to see. Even for us-  _ especially _ for us; we were created to think that our Charges are going to be perfect and that they’ll give us nothing but joy and we’re supposed to love them unconditionally... “ Finally, they had grabbed everything from the trunk and were heading to the room again. Sicheng still hadn’t even look at the older Angel, but he was listening.

Suho waited until they were in the empty stairwell before he began again. “We  _ are  _ supposed to love them, and I know you do and you always will. But we’re supposed to love and accept them for who they  _ are _ . Not who we thought they were. It’s normal to argue, to fight. . We have emotions, we have our own personalities, and sometimes we clash. Because in that sense, we are just as human as them. When I first met Lay, he hated me.” Sicheng finally looked at Suho in surprise, but still said nothing. “Yep. Hated. To his bones. Long story short, I put his faith into question. It took a long time for him to accept me and what I meant to him. But the Link, the bond, the  _ love _ , was always there.

“I know Yuta’s flaws are different. And I don’t know what they are or how you are affected by them. But you need to stop thinking of him as this perfect being, the one who was supposed to be the missing part of your soul, and start thinking of him as a human. A young, human male who has been put through so much recently and needs you there- not as an Angel, not as his lover-” Sicheng flinched at that.  _ How did he know?  _ “- but as his friend. Be there for him in a way that he is comfortable with, Sicheng. You can’t rush acceptance.”

It was silent in the hall again, and as they reached their floor, Sicheng felt the sting of tears in his eyes. The two Angels stopped outside Suho’s room, as Sicheng and Yuta’s was a bit further down the hall, and the older Angel stopped to look at the other boy. He dropped the bags at his feet and clasped Sicheng’s shoulder with one hand. He smiled, full of warmth.

“Go to him, Sicheng. Make this right.” Suddenly, Suho’s mouth tightened slightly, and his eyes grew distant, like he had entered his Angel form. Sicheng opened his mouth to ask what he was doing, but just as quickly as it had happened, Suho’s face returned to normal.

His smile was forced, but he quickly spoke before Sicheng could have the chance. “I’m sorry, Brother. I think Lay managed to hurt himself- probably stepped on something sharp. I don’t know. Hey, why don’t you take Yuta to breakfast?” He was suddenly talking faster, or maybe that was Sicheng’s imagination? “Maybe talk there. Here-” he held out his hand and Sicheng accepted Suho’s wallet from him with a confused frown. “Oh, and these-” he added Suho’s car keys to Sicheng’s hand. “My treat. I think Lay and I are going on a walk. We’ll probably be gone for an hour or so. You go have fun, okay?”

Then, without another word, Suho turned and entered his room, closing the door on Sicheng’s face. Sicheng stood there like an idiot for a good minute or two, before he slowly closed his fingers over the items Suho had thrust into his palm, and then slowly walked back to Yuta’s room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! I finally have internet again! Woo woo woo woo sobang- *dies* Anyway, this chapter is pretty short. Sorry! I was going to make it longer, but I want the next chapter to pick up right where this left off. I'll post it as soon as I have it written up to make up for it. Thanks so much for reading, everyone! Leave a comment or two or three- I love feedback. Bye, lovelies! <3


	8. Chapter 8

**_Chapter Eight_ **

 

Outside the door to their room, Sicheng hesitated. The bags of food and supplies lay at his feet, and his head rested on the door. He knew the human was inside, and that Yuta could sense Sicheng was there, but still he made no move to enter the door.

He deeply regretted what he’d said to the human. The Tree doesn’t make mistakes. Yuta was his Charge. And Sicheng had hurt him- the one thing tethering him to life, the greatest gift, the only thing that allowed him to be there on Earth in the first place. Who knew how many times he’d been Born, and not found his Charge in his past lives? How many times had he returned to the Tree and died in the endless cycle of Angels, until he had finally-  _ finally _ \- found him? Each Angel had one Charge, and one Charge only. And he had messed everything up with his cruel words and actions to the human. His human.

The Tree doesn’t make mistakes. Sicheng. Sicheng had made a mistake.

With those words playing over and over in his head, Sicheng finally mustered up the courage to open the door to their room. His human was still on his bed, with his back facing Sicheng.Yuta ignored him as he set the bags besides his bed, and Sicheng waited. He’d give the human time, like he’d always done before. 

_ You can’t rush acceptance. _

Finally, after exactly 56 seconds, Yuta turned around on the bed and looked up at Sicheng. The human’s eyes were red, like he’d been crying and that was the final blow to Sicheng’s restraint. He’d made his human cry. Sicheng took a step towards Yuta’s bed, but he human suddenly vaulted himself over it and was in Sicheng’s arms.

Sicheng instantly enveloped the human in a tight hug, and the words, “I’m sorry” spilt from both of their mouths simultaneously.

“The Tree doesn’t make mistakes,” Sicheng whispered, eyes closing tightly. 

“I know you’re just trying to help.” Yuta cried into the Angels shoulder.

“I’m so sorry.” Was that Yuta? Or Sicheng?

“Forgive me.” Sicheng? Yuta?

“I messed up.” Was that both of them?

“It won’t happen again, I promise.” Both.

It was silent after. For a long time. They had pulled apart now, but were still in eachother’s arms, staring into the eyes of their soulmate. The Link throbbed between them, and this time Yuta could see it with his human eyes. He saw the blue line leading straight to Sicheng and he knew.

It was Yuta who spoke first, as he always does. “Listen, Sicheng. Please.”

But this time Sicheng spoke over him. “No, Yuta. It’s my fa-”

Yuta frowned sharply and cupped his hand over the Angels’ mouth. “Stop cutting me off.” and then he smiled. And Sicheng smiled. Once Yuta was sure the Angel wouldn’t try again, he removed his hand, but instead left it cradling Sicheng’s cheek. “I’m sorry, Sicheng. I am. If we’re going to make this work, we need to compromise. So, first things first: I am keeping up at night, aren’t I?”

Sicheng waited for a second, wondering if he should tell the truth. “Yes.” He admitted finally. “It’s your dreams. Well, mainly the fact that I can’t do anything to help with them. But I could, Yuta. I could make them go away for you.”

Yuta stared into Sicheng’s eyes as he thought it over. Then he sighed- not quite sad, definitely not happy, but resigned. He nodded. “Okay. I’ll give you that one. It’s not like I  _ like _ having bad dreams, it’s just that.. Well, they’re a part of being human. Not a lot of people have an otherworldly being there to take away all their bad feelings. It’s just.. I don't know. Weird. But if it will make you happy, okay. You can.”

Sicheng smiled, but it was hesitant. He was beginning to hate that word. Hesitate. It was against his nature- he was supposed to  _ do. _

“Yuta,” he started as he realized the human was waiting for him. “I can’t help you if you keep blocking me out. I need to have a constant connection with your mind at all times. It’s… unnatural not to. If i can’t feel you, I won’t be able to find you. That’s how the Link works.”

Yuta nodded. “I know. Compromise. I’ll let you in on the bad stuff, but my emotions are mine. I don’t want you poking around in my head 24/7. If I ever block you out again, I need you to accept it and leave it at that. But, I’ll only block you out when I need to, okay? It’s unnatural-” he stressed that word, as Sicheng had before, “-to have someone else’s thoughts inside my head all day. So, you get your connection back, but I reserve the right to kick you out if I want to. Deal?”

Sicheng thought it over for a few heartbeats. It was better than nothing.

Compromise. A new word- he was sure no other soulmate pair had done that. Not even Suho and Lay. 

Finally, Sicheng nodded and Yuta’s smile was as bright as the sun. His sun. And he’d never let it dim it again.

 

…

 

They had taken Suho’s advice, and were seated at a table inside a Denny’s for breakfast. They’d just finished their meals- two orders of the All-American Slam, and two stacks of pancakes on the side. They were waiting on their complementary shakes to take back to the room when Yuta spoke again.

“Hey, I know we’re past it and we both forgave eachother. But.. about the Tree making mistakes…”

Sicheng cringed, preferring to forget he’d even thought those words. But he looked over at his human and asked, “Yeah?”

Yuta continued. “It’s just.. Has that ever happened before? We’re supposed to be soulmates, and I know you know that. And you knew that when you said it, too. But it had to have popped into your mind from somewhere.”

Sicheng was silent, only looking up to thank the waiter who had just brought their ice cream, then was quiet again. When he spoke, his voice shook. “Suho told me about some of the Angels he’d met before. They weren’t happy with their Charges- granted, some of the stories he told about the humans made me agree. The Angels with incompatible Charges grew to hate their humans, and there was even an Angel who did not protect his human when the time came. Suho said that he saw that Angel purposely fail, and so his soul was sent back to the Tree to die.”

Sicheng shrugged again. “Maybe it was just something Suho told me so I’d get my head together and apologize. Or maybe it’s true. The Tree doesn’t make mistakes, I know. But sometimes, two souls- even two who were meant to be together- clash. Like us. And if it’s not fixed, if they don’t repair their bond, there is nothing tying the Angel to this cruel, confusing world other than a human they have been told is their duty to protect- to care for, and to even die for. The human in that case isn’t their Charge anymore. They’re a burden. I guess it would be a mercy to die, and not be forced to care for someone who hates you. And the only thing that can kill us is-”

“-is if your Charge dies,” Yuta finished quietly.

Sicheng looked over at the human, who was staring down at his fingers. “So, if the story is true, and that Angel really did let the human die, then yes. In that sense, the Tree made a mistake. Because it cost the life of both a human and an Angel. We can feel it, you know, when one of our Brothers dies before their time- even if we’d never met him or her. If their death is violent, if they’re taken away too soon, it’s supposed to be excruciating, like a piece of us is being ripped out. All I know is Suho said he wouldn’t wish it upon his worst enemy. So, to willingly let your Charge die so you can finally return to the Tree, knowing that your Brothers will feel your pain as you do… I can’t even imagine what you would have to be going through their minds. How much pain they’d have to be in to even  _ consider _ -”

Yuta’s hand over his stopped his rant. “Hey,” the human coaxed, putting on a gentle smile as Sicheng turned his face back up to him. “I think I get it. Don’t worry, Sicheng, that’s not going to happen to us. We fixed the bond, remember? I can see it now, all around me. It’s so beautiful, Sicheng. Is this what you get to see all the time?”

Sicheng was grateful for the subject change. He smiled softly, looking at Yuta with adoration in his eyes so strong he knew anyone passing by could see. He turned his hand around so he could link his fingers through his human’s. He took a deep breath and, for the first time in days, he knew that everything would be alright.

 

…

 

Something was wrong. Something was very,  _ very   _ wrong. _. _

They had just gotten back to the hotel, Yuta had parked their car in the lot, and had been moving to exit the vehicle when Sicheng had reached his arm out and all but  _ thrown _ the human back into his seat. Sicheng’s eyes were wide with terror, his heart racing in his chest, as he stared towards the entrance of the hotel. “Sicheng?” Yuta asked in panic, having felt Sicheng’s fear through their strengthened bond. “Sicheng, what’s wrong? What is it?”

Sicheng tried to answer, he really did. But he couldn’t speak past the fear lodged in his throat. He pushed Yuta back further in his seat in a warning for the human to  _ stay _ , and slowly withdrew his arm and exited the vehicle. He stood and slowly circled the car, coming around to Yuta’s side, looking around wildly for any threat, any danger, but he still couldn’t see anything.

But he knew.

“Yuta,” Sicheng whispered as the human opened the door and came to stand slightly behind Sicheng, squished tightly against his back. “Stay close to me.” He felt Yuta nod against his back, and reached around to grab his hand tightly, and lead them slowly to the windows beside the door to the building to peer inside.

When Sicheng looked in at the front desk and saw no human there, but that there was instead a sign indicating that the woman there had gone on her lunch break and would be back in half an hour, A glance around the lobby revealed that it was just as empty, but he quickly entered his Angelic form and looked around for any outlines- the only ones came from the rooms about them.

Sicheng’s fear mulled slightly, being replaced with confusion. He lead Yuta through the door, always keeping in front of him, until they made it into the elevator where he allowed himself to relax slightly. They hit the button for their floor, and Yuta let out a shaky breath. “What is it?” the human asked, holding tightly to Sicheng’s hand.

Sicheng, without thinking, reached over with his empty hand and smoothed it over Yuta’s face. “There’s something here. We need to leave; we have to tell Suho.”

Yuta nodded once, and then Sicheng had his arms full with the human. Yuta squeezed him tightly for a second, and then stepped back as the elevator stopped.

Sicheng startled at the  _ ding  _ that sounded before the doors opened, and pushed Yuta back against a wall as he entered his Angel form again to look around.

He flew down the hall, passing several rooms with dull-yellow lights that were barely visible through the walls, until he reached the end of the hall, where Suho and Lay’s room was. If he hadn’t been so confused and scared, he would have stopped before he had gotten close because he couldn’t see Suho’s purple outline, but the emotions swirling through his brain made him miss it.

But when he did notice, he froze outside their doorway, which had been left cracked open slightly. He pushed through the crack and entered the room, and what he saw shocked him back into his physical form.

He jolted with a gasp, stumbling back into Yuta who instantly reached up to catch him, shouting, “What! What’s wrong?”

Sicheng didn’t answer him, just grabbed Yuta’s hand again and sprinted out of the elevator before it closed again, running down the hall and stopping outside Suho’s room again. He pushed the door open fully and shoved Yuta inside, closing it tightly behind him.

Yuta froze, just as Sicheng had, and looked around at the mess. 

The bed had been completely flipped over, pillows and blankets strewn across the floor. The TV, which had been mounted on the wall, was laying on the carpet, completely shattered, on the other side of the small room, as if someone had thrown it. There were two open suitcases out, which were currently kicked into the corner with clothes- some still folded- spilling out from them. The small dresser which had been below the TV had no drawers, but Sicheng spotted some of them in pieces by the door leading to the bathroom, which Sicheng followed.

The bathroom was worse. The shower curtain had been ripped out of the wall, looking again like it had been thrown as it was currently sticking through the wall opposite the shower. Sicheng felt a strong breeze blow his hair back and was shocked to see that the window  _ had no glass _ , and that there were pieces of it now shattered everywhere he stepped. The bathroom sink had received the same treatment, and now the bowl had jagged edges that were stained red with blood.

Human blood. Angel blood was gold.

Sicheng stared in shock and horror. What had happened while they were away?

Yuta’s voice was shaky as he called Sicheng from the bedroom. “Sicheng? Hey… there’s a… note.”

On shaky legs, Sicheng moved on autopilot back to Yuta, unable to look away from the disaster of the room, and stood next to Yuta, who had retreated to the door, and was holding a crumpled piece of paper. The human looked up from reading as Sicheng approached, eyes wide with terror. Sicheng was too shocked to do any more than brush his hand against the humans shoulder, instinctively feeling the need to provide some comfort.

“It says,” Yuta whispered, too afraid to speak any louder. His voice broke, and Sicheng opted to take the paper and read it for himself. The letter had been written on the hotel’s stationary, and in blue ink. It was scratched and blotted, and the letters were scrawled and barely legible. It said:

**Theyre coming we have to leave im sorry theres no time they dont know youre here you need to go theyll get you i tried to teach you everything you have to protect yuta** **TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS** **yixing and i are going to try to**

And that was the end. Sicheng read it over a thousand times, committing every letter to memory, trying to discern any type of meaning, but he didn’t understand anything. “Where was this?” Sicheng asked, looking up at Yuta to see the human staring at the note in his hands. 

His voice was still shaky with fear as he answered, “It was under the TV.”

Sicheng quickly crushed the note in his hands into dust and grabbed Yuta’s hand again, and quickly ran to their own room. “We need to go.”

Yuta didn’t question. He quickly grabbed his bag, his toiletries, and his phone, and they were out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the wait, everyone! I had surgery about two weeks ago and was having some complications from it. really did not feel like writing or posting anything. But I'm better now! :) and ooo can anyone guess what happened to suho and lay? <3


	9. Chapter 9

**_Chapter Nine_ **

 

They passed by the receptionist on their way out the door, who glared at them as they ran past her. Sicheng didn’t even notice she was there- too driven by fear and instinct telling him to  _ get Yuta away _ \- but Yuta turned to her briefly and apologized, before they got into the truck.

Sicheng got there first and jumped into the driver’s side, starting the engine as he waited impatiently for Yuta to hop in. Thankfully, the human didn’t protest having Sicheng drive his precious vehicle; he did warn the Angel to be careful, though.

Sicheng barely heard him, but he nodded all the same as he shifted into reverse and pulled away from the hotel. “We have to get out of the city,” he told Yuta, eyes on the road and heart still pumping in his chest. “Suho said the last Angel pair he met had been heading to Colorado; I’m too young to protect you on my own. We need to find them and get their help.”

Yuta nodded, but Sicheng had his eyes forward so he didn’t see. They pulled onto the highway- which, at this hour was a bit emptier than usual- and Sicheng brought the truck up to 50 miles per hour. Yuta glanced worriedly around the truck, and a speed limit sign flashed briefly in front of them, reading that it was only a 25 mile per hour zone. “Sicheng,” he said in a warning tone, “you need to slow down- we don’t need to get pulled over-”

Sicheng shook his head and suddenly veered into the right lane of traffic, causing the car behind them to blare their horn angrily. Sicheng paid them no mind. “No, Yuta. We need to go  _ now. _ I can feel it.”

That silenced the rest of the human’s protests. If Sicheng sensed something was wrong, he would trust him. Sicheng even sped up a little, so Yuta quickly put on his seat belt, just in case.

After a minute of silence, Yuta swallowed heavily, and reached over like he was going to grab Sicheng’s hand, but at the speed they were going it was best that Sicheng keep both hands on the wheel. He was beginning to always crave Sicheng’s touch, especially when he was upset. But the scene in Suho’s hotel room had completely terrified him, and he could feel a panic attack on. He tried to clamp down his emotions so Sicheng could focus on driving, but he just kept seeing the dark red blood splattered on the cream wallpaper that had covered the room, the golden specks of it he had seen in the bathroom, and he couldn’t stop it. His breathing quickened and his heart raced even faster. He opened his mouth to warn Sicheng but he felt nothing come out.

Yuta heard Sicheng sigh, then his hand was suddenly wrapped in the Angels, and a wave of calm flooded into him. He was finally calming down enough to refocus on the situation, and he could feel Sicheng’s thumb rubbing the skin over the back of his hand constantly. Yuta took a few deep breaths into his oxygen-starved lungs gratefully, bringing Sicheng’s hand up to his lips to press a kiss there. When he pulled back, Sicheng moved his hand to cup Yuta’s chin fondly, before grabbing his hand again.

He blushed as he set their entwined hands back down onto his lap. They hadn’t really talked about the implications of their relationship yet. They were soulmates, but what did that mean? Was Sicheng just there to take care of him, like a bodyguard of sorts? Or did it mean they were supposed to be together…  _ romantically _ ? Like the cheesy books and movies Yuta’s sister had made him watch when he was a kid. Yuta had never liked those movies- the idea that you had no choice in the matter of who you would spend the rest of your life with- but now that he actually  _ had _ one…

Yuta shivered and released Sicheng’s hand after one final squeeze. If the Angel was upset by that, he didn’t show it, just reached back to place both hands on the steering wheel.

When Yuta finally looked up again, the clock told him that they had been driving for about 20 minutes now, and they were currently stopped at a red light close to the edge of town. Sicheng was quiet, and as Yuta looked over he saw that Sicheng’s eyebrows were pulled tightly together and he was staring heavily at something down the road in front of him. “What is it?” Yuta asked, turning forward, but he couldn’t see anything past the line of cars in front of him.

Sicheng didn’t turn his head as he answered, “The road out of town is blocked and there are cops everywhere. They’re going door to door and talking with the drivers. Two people just got pulled out of their vehicle and are getting thrown in the back of a cruiser, but they’re still going.”

Yuta shivered, even he had a bad feeling about this. “Can you tell what they’re saying?”

Sicheng finally looked at Yuta and was quiet, like he was thinking, for a few seconds. Finally, he said, “I could if I go into my Angel form, but I don’t want to leave you alone.”

Yuta jerked his head to the side, towards where he could just barely make out a group of police officers heading towards them. “Go! Hurry!”

Sicheng shook his head with a frown on his face, but eventually caved and shut his eyes tightly, moving to his angel form. He quickly glanced around the truck at the outlines of the humans around them, seeing that only a few of them had normal white outlines, and the rest had varying tones of yellow. He then flew towards the closest police officer and hovered in front of the man as he bent his head to the window of a grey Saturn Ion with a woman inside.

“Evening, ma’am,” the officer said.

The woman smiled, a forced, confused smile. “Hello, officer. Is there a problem?”

The officer shook his head kindly. “Not really, I just need to ask you a few questions, is all Nothing to worry about,” he hurried as the woman’s eyes widened in surprise. “I hope you don’t mind...”

The woman collected herself quickly and forced another pleasant smile. “No, officer. I don’t mind. It’s just that with this…  _ thing _ happening in the West… Well, I guess I was afraid it’d be something worse.” The woman chuckled slightly, but Sicheng detected no humor.

The officer smiled again, and either he was a pretty good actor or he really wasn’t lying when he said, “Don’t worry, ma’am. Just a routine procedure; a few questions, and then a quick blood test..”

The woman relaxed a little “Okay, officer. What do you need to know?”

“Alrighty then,” The officer smiled again and brought up a clipboard he had been holding below the car’s window. “Like I said, this is all just a routine that we have to go through with everyone leaving the city, alright? Nothing to worry about. Can I have your name, ma’am”

The woman nodded again. “Carla. Carla McHenry.”

The officer nodded and wrote something down in his clipboard. “Alright Carla, now please answer the following questions as honestly as possible. Have you been in contact with someone who may or may not have been infected with the Harelquin Flash?”

_ Harelquin Flash? What is that? _

The woman shook her head quickly, eyes locked onto the officer’s face. “No, officer. Well, not recently. My husband’s mother’s funeral was in the summer, but that was the last time I’d been near one. I watch the news; I know to stay away.”

The officer wrote down her response. “I’m sorry to hear that ma’am. Please give my condolences. Now, your mother-in-law, she hadn’t shown any signs of possibly being infected, had she?”

“No, sir. I think she missed it.”

Again, the officer copied her response. “Alright, Carla, just one more question and then the blood test, alright?” The woman-Carla- nodded again. “I need you to repeat to me all safety measures we are required to follow by state and national law in regards to the Harelequin Flash.”

Carla’s brows furrowed in concentration. “Um, well we’re supposed to wear rubber gloves when handling food, wash and sanitize our clothes every day, no going out after 9 o’clock, and uh… burn anything that might have been in contact with anything infected.”

The officer, who had been checking items off on a list as she spoke, stopped for a few heartbeats. He then lifted his head away from the clipboard and looked at Carla with a frown. “You missed one.”

Carla’s eyes widened and flickered briefly to a commotion outside- another man had been pulled from his vehicle and was being escorted away from the line of cars. Sicheng also noted that a few police officers were in charge of moving the emptied vehicles out of the way.

Sicheng turned back as the woman squeaked loudly in triumph, apparantly having remembered, “Oh, yes! I’m so sorry officer, it just completely slipped my mind. We need to report anyone who shows even the slightest signs of the illness to any official, and are to avoid direct contact with anyone unless absolutely necessary.” She took a deep breath when she was done, and stared at the officer with a strange expression that Sicheng couldn’t quite name.

_ Pleading?  _ Yes, but there was more.  _ Nervousness?  _ Of course she was nervous, but…  _ fear?  _ No, what she was feeling was stronger than that. 

_ Terror. The woman was terrified. But of what? The man had been nothing but calm, collected and friendly to her. What could she have to fear from him? What was going on? _

The officer didn’t even look at her as he then asked, “And you wouldn’t have any reason not to report someone being sick, would you, Mrs. McHenry?” Sicheng’s heart skipped a beat- it was just a change of how he referred to her, but Sicheng could sense a hidden meaning but couldn’t decipher it.

The woman’s mouth dropped open and she swallowed audibly. Her voice shook. “N-No! No, officer. My husband and I live alone now that our daughter went off to school in Florida. No, we’ve got nothing to hide.” She tried to smile bravely, but her bottom lip was quivering too much to come off as anything but an attempt to hide the smell of fear emanating from her.

The man- Sicheng finally focused hard enough to read his nametag: Bruce. Bruce did not say anything for a few more heartbeats, before he checked the final box in on the list and looked back at the woman with a smile that was no longer genuine. “That’s completely fine then, Mrs. McHenry. As long as you remember the laws. Now for the blood test. Could you please hold out your hand?”

Carla’s hand trembled as she reached around her body and offered it, palm up, to Bruce. Bruce pulled out a small device from a pack on his waist, along with a sanitary wipe which he used to clean a needle that poked out of the top before he held the woman’s shaking hand in his. If he noticed the obvious tremors in her arm at his touch, he didn’t say anything. He simply pricked the tip of her index finger with it, and the needle quickly retracted into the machine.

After a few heart-stopping moments where the two humans held their breath, the screen on the machine lit up and displayed a giant, green checkmark in the middle of a white circle. The officer let out a deep breath of relief, finally looking back to Carla’s face and smiling- this time a true smile- and said, “Alright, Carla. You’re in the clear. I have to remind you, though, that we will have to repeat this process every time you leave and enter the city. So, if I were you, I’d try to find a job here, in Omaha.”

Sicheng didn’t stay any longer to hear the woman’s reply. He slammed his eyes shut and was instantly transported back to his physical form, breathing heavily. “Sicheng?” Yuta asked instantly, grabbing his hand again. “What are they doing?”

“We need to go.”

Yuta looked around them. “What? Why? Where would we even go? We’re surrounded.”

Sicheng glanced out the windows and saw that they had been completely boxed in with cars all around them. “They’re asking if anyone had touched a dead body recently,” Sicheng explained as he unbuckled his seat belt to leave. He gave a pointed look to Yuta when the human went to the same. He continued, “And you have. They’re testing people’s blood to.. I don’t know. I think it has something to do with that thing we saw on the TV in the hospital, when I first found you. The ‘Harlequin Flash’ is what they’re calling it. They’re testing everyone’s blood t osee if they have been infected..”

Yuta’s eyes were so wide it was almost comical. “ _ What? _ But- But I have- am I infected?!”

Sicheng held a finger up to his lips to silence him as he sensed more policemen approaching their truck. The closest one was probably only a few yards away. “I don’t kn- yes. Yes you are. We can’t let them test you- they take anyone who fails the test away and I don’t know where they put them, but I get the feeling it’s not good. We need to leave.” 

“What are you going to do?” Yuta’s voice was very small.

Sicheng didn’t answer. “Stay here. And keep the connection open, Yuta, I mean it.” he commanded again and then pushed open the car door, closing it behind him.

He could see a police officer stopped at a car only two rows ahead of him. He took a deep breath and then started towards the woman dressed in the city’s blue uniform. She didn’t notice him until he was standing a few feet away from her, jumping a little when he cleared his throat. “Oh!” She exclaimed, placing a hand over her heart. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you. Can I help you?”  
Sicheng nodded, and purposely made his voice soft and soothing.“Yeah, um. Can I just ask how long this is going to take? My friend and I are already really late for work and our boss  is kind of a dick.”

The officer’s eyes softened as Sicheng worked his magic on her. “Oh, I’m sorry. I know it’s really hard to wait, but we’re under strict orders to question everyone trying to leave the city on this road and-”

“Oh,” Sicheng faked surprise. “Well, could you go ahead and ask me them? It’s really important that we get there soon; our boss is… well, I think he’s sick of putting up with the tests and having us be late all the time, you know?”

Again, the human’s eyes softened under Sicheng’s stare. It was  _ impossible _ to deny Sicheng when he used his angelic Voice. Suho had taught him how to persuade humans into doing what he asked. 

_ It’s called your Voice and it’s something even a one-day old could do, _ he’d explained with a smile.  _ Humans are easy to control when you use it. It might not work like you might want it to everytime- like if you tried telling a human to do something they would never do in their right mind. Like, I don’t know. Asking a mother to kill her baby. If it’s something they would never do, it won’t work. But if you ask for simple favors, they’ll have to obey. _

The police officer’s eyes were completely glazed over at this point. “Sure thing, sweetheart,” she said with an infatuated smile. “I can ask you right now, if you’d like?”

“Actually,” Sicheng shook his head, knowing he had her under his control. “Would it be okay if we skipped it all? We’re  _ really  _ late.” He pursed his lips into a pout, just to be sure.

The woman actually looked like she might start crying. “Oh no, you poor thing! Of course I can skip it. Don’t you worry at all, sweetie. I’ll take care of everything. You get to work- oh, and here!” She quickly brought her clipboard out and scribbled something on a piece of paper, which she then handed to him. “It’s a pass. Show this to any officer running tests in any quarantined city and they’ll let you pass. If you hear any complaints, tell them to call me- my name’s Eve, number’s at the bottom- and I’ll set them straight.” she said sternly, like it would have been a personal offense if someone tried to stop Sicheng again.

“Thank you so much!” Sicheng smiled and the woman looked like she might faint. “I really appreciate it! You guys are doing a great job out here,” he beamed at her, still laying it on thick- he’d never done this before, so he didn’t want to risk her snapping back to herself before he had gotten Yuta out of there.

“Oh, hush you,” the woman smiled, her expression full of bliss. “You just get to work!”

Sicheng nodded his head, and with one final ‘thank you’, turned and jogged back to the truck with Yuta. Before he got back in, though, he circled around to the car in the lane next to him and tapped on the window. The driver- a man this time- rolled it down and glared at him. “What do you want?”

Sicheng used his Voice again, and said, “Hi, my friend and I are going to be late for school, and it’s a really important test we’re taking. Would you mind if you moved your car out of the lane just for a second so we could go?”

The man’s glare only lessened slightly, before he began shaking his head.

Sicheng just repeated himself, this time throwing in a pout. The man shook his head again, but his face was beginning to slacken. He felt kind of embarrassed at the double rejection, but then repeated his plea once more and the man’s eyes finally glazed over. He nodded, then began pulling away form the cars he was sandwiched between.

Yuta was quiet when Sicheng climbed back into the driver’s seat, and all throughout the rest of the drive out of town. When they had finally gotten about 20 miles away and were driving down a heavily-populated highway, the human spoke again.

“You have some explaining to do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'cause let's be honest, if winwin ever told me to do something with A FREAKING POUT i would roll over and die and so that's what everyone in this world will also do. thanks for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this chapter has a bit of/ is mostly not-PG13 things in it towards the end. You have been warned. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**_Chapter Ten_ **

 

As Sicheng explained everything Suho had told him, from his Angel abilities to Lay’s mother, he drove us out of Lincoln and down to the city of Hebron, Nebraska- a small town of a little over 1,000 people. I stayed quiet, digesting everything he was telling me, and even after he was done I didn’t say anything until we were almost out of the city. And that was just to remind him that, “Sicheng, we need to get gas before we leave.”

Sicheng let out a breath of air and he almost looked like he was going to argue with me, but then he looked down at the almost empty tank and nodded. “Yeah, I know. Let’s make it quick, okay? Something doesn’t feel right.”

I frowned. “You’ve been saying that since we left Lincoln, Sicheng. Are you sure it’s not just the shock?” 

Sicheng just nodded, and Yuta sat back in his seat with a grunt.

Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I knew that Sicheng must have legit been sensing  _ something _ but he was  _ always _ saying that. Knowing that Sicheng was there to protect me from everything meant that Sicheng usually perceived anything as a threat, no matter what it actually was.

“Okay,” I mumbled awkwardly when Sicheng kept quiet after that. “Well I think I have enough cash to spare for maybe one more full tank in this thing,” I patted the dash lightly. “Did Suho give you any?”

Sicheng shrugged again. “If he did, it’d be in one of the bags. We’ll sort through them later.” And then he was quiet again as he lead the truck through the town.

_ Okay I guess he isn’t really in a talking mood _ , I thought, turning my head to look at the window to the street outside. There were a few people milling about, and those laws about physical contact seemed like they weren’t so enforced here as there were a few people hugging eachother and holding hands.

“Suho is still alive.”

I jumped at Sicheng’s voice and placed my hand over my heart. “Jesus!” I glared over at Sicheng and saw him turn away from facing me- the red light we’d been stopped at had just turned green again. “Warn a guy next time.”

That finally got him to smile- only for a second, but it chased away the darkness in his expression for at least a bit. His face was not made to be so stoic.

“Sorry,” Sicheng apologized, staring forward again now. “But I wanted to let you know. When we first met them, at that gas station, when my Angel flew at him, it opened up a link between us. It’s not blue like ours, nor as strong. It’s purple, and I can only see it when I’m in my Angel form, and there’s no line to it; it’s like a dot that shows me where they are.

“He’s alive, which means Lay is too. But they’re so far away that I can barely see them. We weren’t gone long enough for them to have gotten that far away unless whoever took them was  _ trying _ to separate us and is putting as much distance as possible between us and them. Suho told us to run and he told me that my Brother, Ten, was taking his Charge- Johnny- to see his mother in Colorado and that he’d last seen him in Chicago. We need to get to Johnny and prepare for whatever is about to happen, okay?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I get it. But how are we going to find him?” 

Sicheng made a sudden right turn to pull up next to a gas pump at the station. “If I focus enough, I can send my Angel form to check around at night. As I get stronger, I can push myself more and more and cover more ground. Suho said he’d been telling all the Angels to go out at night to try to find everyone, after that last Angel let his Charge die. He wanted us all to get closer together so we could help stop that from ever happening again.”

I frowned, not liking this plan at all. “You’re going to purposefully exert yourself?” Sicheng didn’t answer at first, but he gave me a strange look as he unbuckled and opened the door to leave. I continued talking as I copied him, not bothering to lower my voice when I finally got out of the truck and went to stand beside him. “Weren’t you just saying that you’re already using most of your energy on keeping the virus out of me?”

Sicheng didn’t answer again so I went to stand in front of him, backing him up against the side of the truck. “Sicheng? You’re using way too much of your energy. You’re still really young,” I frowned again, stepping closer when he lowered his head to look down at the ground.

I tried to get a read on his emotions through the Link but was met with a wall on  _ his  _ side.  _ He _ was blocking  _ me _ ! “What the fuck?! Sicheng, are you seriously blocking me out right now?” Angry now, I reached up and grabbed his shoulders, moving him so his back was touching the cool steel. 

It didn’t fail to resonate with me that he was  _ letting  _ me do this, as he could have easily broken my hold on him the second I touched him. But I was too angry to care. “What is up with you today?”

Still, the Angel was quiet though I could feel him shaking. But I wasn’t as good as reading emotions as he obviously was, so I shook him lightly. “Oh, no. You don’t get to be mad at me. You’ve been getting all pissy at me whenever I keep you out, but now that you’re doing it, it’s fine?”

I didn’t even know what I was getting mad about anymore. I didn’t even know if I  _ was  _ mad and if I was being honest with myself, I probably wasn’t mad at all. At least not at him- definitely not at him. Scared, frustrated, confused, hurt, yes, but not mad.

So when Sicheng finally snapped, obviously having just been letting me get through my temper tantrum, and grabbed my arms tightly, spinning us around so he was now the one crowding me against my own truck, I let it happen. 

And when he pressed his lips in a closed-mouth, harsh kiss against my own, I let it happen.

The kiss- if it could even be called that- lasted only one second before Sicheng broke away and pressed his forehead into the space between my shoulder and neck and broke down sobbing in my arms. “I can’t protect you!” he cried, wrapping his arms so tightly around my back I felt my bones protest. “I’m too weak! I’m su- _ supposed _ to keep you safe but I can’t and I don’t know what you want me to do. I have to get you to Johnny so he can help me protect you but I don’t even know if I can do  _ that! _

“What if something happens to you? Your immune system is completely shot and the only reason you’re not one _ -one of those things _ is because I’m spending all of my time keeping this thing  _ out of you _ and if I’m doing that then how am I going to keep you safe from  _ the rest of the world?!”  _ Sicheng was mad now, I could tell. Mad even as he soaked my shirt with his tears. “And you keep fighting me every step of the way even though we were supposed to be over this! I can’t take it! What am I supposed to do, Yuta? Huh?! What do you want me to do!”

Honestly, I was still in a state of shock over the kiss. It had been both the shortest, and the single greatest kiss I’d ever had in my life- and I’d had plenty- and I didn’t think I’d ever recover from it. But when Sicheng finished, I came back into existence and pulled his head up and kissed him again. 

Sicheng whined into my mouth, fingers tightening in my shirt, pulling the fabric so taut I was afraid it would rip and no matter how much I might have wanted to get him naked at that point, now was not the time. I let him pretend to be in control of our lips for only a second before I took over, pulling his chest into mine and trailing one hand up and down his back as the other reached up and tangled itself into his hair.

I angled his head down a bit and pressed my tongue against his closed lips, asking for entry. It was his first kiss, I realized, so I had planned on taking it slow but as soon as he opened up and his tongue met mine without hesitation, I lost all sense of control.

Fireworks exploded inside of me- no, that wasn’t right. That wasn’t enough. It was more than that. My entire body trembled- absolutely quaked- in his arms, and the fact that he wouldn’t stop fucking  _ whining  _ in his throat, so deeply I thought I could feel it in mine- was doing nothing to stop my growing excitement. 

Sicheng pulled away briefly for a gasp of air before he smashed his mouth back onto mine and tangled his tongue to my own again. I wondered how on Earth he was so good at this as it was his first time, but then he took my tongue into his and actually  _ sucked _ on it and I couldn’t think of anything anymore.

Everything was a bit of a blur from then on. I remember there was a fair amount of groping, some desperate breaks for air, a few hickeys coming from both sides, and when I came back to my senses I had somehow rolled us around so that I was again the one holding him against the truck only this time I had pinned his hands above his head with one of mine and the other was inside his pants.

“Holy shit,” I gasped, shaking my head quickly and moved myself in front of him again- but this time to cover him from anyone’s stare- though it was almost midnight. Sicheng’s eyes were screwed shut tightly, his head thrown back against the steel behind him, hair disheveled, lips swollen and bruised, and he was  _ still _ whimpering.

I desperately wanted to continue- desperately. My dick was pounding angrily, denting the seam of my pants which I was both thankful and incredibly frustrated to see that I was still wearing as Sicheng’s were opened at the fly and beginning to sag down his hips. Gasping, I reached out and caught them before they could fall completely and hoisted them upwards again, and it was then that Sicheng seemed to snap out of it as well.

He came to, panting and gasping and doing  _ nothing _ to help my problem as he stared at me with half-lidded eyes. His voice cracked and broke as he whispered, “Wait… wh-... what?”

“Sicheng,” I whispered, screwing my eyes shut so I wouldn’t have to look at the debauchery spread out in front of me, “We… we’re in public.”

“You’ve done it in public before.”

That startled a laugh out of me as I finished pulling his pants back into place. “Yes, I have. But not with my supernatural Angel soulmate while on the run from his “feelings” and in front of a gas station employee. I’m just glad it’s almost midnight and there’s not many people around.” He seemed very disappointed but helped me fix his clothes and then reached up to help fix mine but I held my hands up to stop him- I did not need him to touch me anymore right now if I wanted my boner to go away.

I left him alone to get himself get back under control as I began feuling the truck, and then walked around the parking lot while it was being filled. It was the middle of October so thankfully it was cold enough outside that I calmed down pretty fast.

But the feeling of warmth and pure joy stayed and I didn’t want it to ever go away. I guess that answered my questions before- we were definitely meant to get together for real. There’s no way we would have responded like that if we weren’t; and while I wasn’t proud of my past I knew from experience that it had  _ never  _ felt like that before.

But, then again… I’m sure all the time I’d spent with both men and women would come in handy later on with Sicheng… Hopefully not too much later on.

When I finally calmed down enough, I found Sicheng leaning against the side of the truck, staring at me with a smirk. I smiled back and went easily to him, giving him a light peck on the cheek- and even that left sparks on my lips. Sicheng hummed and he  _ really  _ needed to stop making noise. “I payed at the pump,” he told me as he reached down and interlocked our fingers. “Let’s go.”

I nodded without arguing this time. “Hey,” I stopped him with a tug on our hands when he went to hop in the driver’s side again. “Aren’t you tired? You need sleep.”  
Sicheng shook his head and a bright red blush bloomed across his cheeks. “No, I’m good. That, uh.. Woke me up.”

It took me a second to process what he meant but when I did I smirked again and reached around with my other hand and smoothed it across his ass.  _ Mmm. Me likey.  _ His blush deepened- if it was even possible- and he let out an indignant squeak as he turned and all but threw himself in the truck.

I let out a laugh and followed him after.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone I'm sorry about the wait!! My younger sisters laptop broke and shes in college so I am letting her use mine until she can get a new one. I had all of this written before i traded it off so I'll post this chapter now but it's not completed and I'm not sure when it will be. And I dont really think this fits? too well with the flow of the story so idk I might just rewrote the whole thing one day. But here is this much at least so you all have this to maybe hold you over a bit? I'm really sorry but I'll start writing as soon as my sister has a laptop again. Thank you all so much for reading!!

**_Chapter Eleven_ **

 

“So,” I started with a smile as Sicheng pulled away from the gas station and headed back down the highway. “Are we gonna talk about this?”

Sicheng’s blush deepened again. His ears were red now. “Um-” his voice cracked up and he cleared his throat. “We… Yeah, we probably should.”

I waited for him to start. After a moment of silence, I realized he was waiting for me to start, too, so I blurted, “That was hot. Like, way hot. Like, that’s never happened to me before.. What was it?”

Sicheng’s mouth hung open and he suddenly pulled over on the side of the street- we had just gotten about a mile out of town so there was no one around. “Yuta! Don’t say that!”

“What? That you’re hot? You are.”

Sicheng groaned and his hands flew up to cover his face. I thought it was adorable and also extremely funny. _ Hadn’t he been literally all over me like 10 minutes ago? Or, well I guess I was the one on him… mmm. _

Sicheng interrupted my blissful thoughts when he shouted, “Yuta I swear to God if you don’t stop throwing those images at me-”

I smirked but when I opened my eyes- I hadn’t even realized they were closed- and saw him staring at me pitifully, I decided to be merciful. “Alright. I’ll stop- or at least I’ll try. But give me some credit here, Sicheng. You are absolutely gorgeous. And I’m gonna blame some of my reaction just now on the fact that you’re my magic Angle soulmate who was destined to be mine forever and-”

Sicheng let out a deep groan and suddenly there was a hand over my mouth. “Yuta. Stop.”

I rolled my eyes as I stuck my tongue out and licked a long stripe against his palm. It was a dirty move, I know, but it worked as Sicheng immediately pulled his hand away with a disgusted scowl. “Dude-”

“Ew. Don’t you ever call me ‘dude’ again,” Sicheng jutted in, still glaring at me, which did nothing to lessen the smile on my face or the feeling of absolute bliss in my chest.

“Alright alright.” I said, putting forth a serious effort to get my mind to focus. I knew we needed to talk about what had happened back at the gas station, but I… I guess I was a little scared about what Sicheng would say. I’d had plenty-  _ a lot _ \- of hookups and one-night-stands in my 23 years of living, but I’d had my fair share of failures or guys who I’d been making out with who had then turned around and called me a fag because someone had seen us.

It sucked, but I was more than used to it.

But I didn’t think I could handle it if Sicheng said those things- not that I thought he would. He’d already told me he was there to protect and care for me, and while I didn’t really know how he felt outside of that, I knew he obviously liked me enough to have let what happened in Hebron, happen. And he didn’t really seem like the type of guy who would do that, anyway- he was a legit Angel after all. But I’m man enough to admit that I’d been hurt enough times in the past to make me a little scared of the possibilities.

“I’m not going to call you a fag, Yuta.”

“ _ Jesus Christ! _ Don’t  _ do _ that! You’re gonna give me a heart attack!” Sicheng actually looked like he believed me for a second- he even reached out as if to touch my chest- but I grabbed his hand gently and pushed it down in between our bodies, which were now facing eachother. “I’m joking, Sicheng. But I swear to God- you can’t keep having one-sided conversations with my mind. If I wanted you to hear that, I would have said it out loud. Also, please don’t ever say that again- or, you know what- don’t say any cuss words, please? It just… sounds  _ wrong. _ ”

Sheepish now, and possibly a little apologetic, Sicheng’s hand turned over in mine and he interlocked our fingers- something he’d been doing since he found me but now it felt like  _ more. _

“I’m sorry. But I’m not, Yuta. I won’t, I mean. Please tell me you know that.”

I nodded instantly. “Of course I do. It was just a thought. A thought that you weren’t meant to hear in the first place.,” I said, rolling my eyes though I really wasn’t too bothered by it. “So can you stop apologizing so we can get on with this talk?”

Nodding, Sicheng dropped our entwined hands and reached up to his face again where he began rubbing his forehead like he had a headache. This put a serious damper on my good mood, and I reached over and cupped his chin with one hand. “Hey,” I asked quietly. “Are you okay? I really wasn’t being serious with the fag thing, okay?”

“No, it’s not that. It’s just that this feeling- Don’t give me that look; I can’t think of another word- my ‘intuition’? It’s just screaming at me to get you away from here. But we need to talk and this conversation is way too important. Look, I don’t know why your reaction- our reactions- were so strong. I never asked Suho about that.” He said this with a dry look. “ I was a little busy learning the  _ important _ stuff.”

“Suho didn’t say anything to you at all about what this bond might do for us?”

Sicheng scrunched his nose up- it was adorable. “No. He did let on that he and Lay were… you know. Together. But he never said it had anything to do with the bond. But, I don’t know, it is possible.” He shrugged. “My soul  _ is _ tied to yours. I guess ‘soulmate’ is a pretty accurate term for it. I was always destined to be your partner; it was up to you in what way.”

_ “I was always destined to be your partner.” _

We sat there in relative silence for a few long moments, staring at eachother and hearing the muted radio playing some old 50s swing- God what had Sicheng turned it to?- and then I realized Sicheng was probably waiting for me to say something.

I had lots to say to that little bombshell he just dropped, but the only thing I could think of was, “My partner?” like an idiot.

Sicheng nodded with not even a hint of exasperation. “Yeah. That’s what all Angels are for. If we’re going to spend the rest of our lives together, we might as well live them happily, together. It’s up to you where you want to take this… If you want to… be together, or if you want to forget any of that even happened…” Sicheng swallowed hard and my stomach rolled at the thought of it. No way. “We’re here to keep you safe  _ and _ happy. So, whatever you want this relationship to be, we’ll make it work.”

My heartrate kicked up a notch. This was entering dangerous territory- I’d only ever considered serious relationships with two people in my life and we both knew how they had turned out. Again, like an idiot, I asked, “Relationship? With me?”

Sicheng furrowed his brow. “Yeah… Are you okay? Your heart just kicked up.”

Was I okay? I couldn’t tell. “You tell me. What do I feel like?”

Sicheng frowned now and closed his eyes; I could actually feel him now whenever he picked through my emotions- little tugs on invisible strings that all lead straight to him. “You’re scared.” His eyes opened again; free of judgement, disdain, anger, and full of concern and fondness.

I took a deep breath to steady my nerves. “Do you want this, Sicheng?” We both knew what I was talking about.

“If it will make you happy-” he started to answer immediately.

“No,” I interrupted. “Don’t think about me right now. Be selfish. Do you want actually want this? Do you want to be with me? Will it make you happy?”

Sicheng didn’t hesitate and when he answered, his voice shook. “Yes, Yuta. Yes, it would.  I want this.”

My heart, which had been thumping inside my chest, finally slowed back to normal. I nodded, and reached over to grab his hand in mine- he interlocked our fingers again. “You and me against the world?” I asked, feeling a little dumb and a lot happy.

Sicheng’s smile stole my breath. He leaned toward me and whispered against my lips, “You and me against the world.”

 


	12. I'm back!

Finally!! Thanks so much for waiting, I hope you all haven't given up on me! Expect a new chapter soon!! <3


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